Fear has been on my mind a lot lately, especially when it comes to this venture of Pajamas Notebook. I started out as I always do, like a firecracker, but as time goes on I find myself getting fearful again. This time around, it is a different type of fear than I am normally accustomed to. Usually, I would get scared of failure. “What if no one likes me?” “What if I fail miserably?” Those feelings I am used to and have become really good at handling,so they don’t bother me anymore. What this new fear does deal with is the fear of success! Odd, isn’t it?
This time around I find myself saying, “What if I become successful?” or“What if my message takes off and the spotlight starts to shine on me?” How do I handle that? Being a humble person, the thought of “all eyes on me” is a bit daunting, as I have never wanted to outshine anyone else in my life. I suffer from “feeling bad for those around me when I start to take the lead so I step back” syndrome. This was even stronger when I became a Wife and Mother. I always wanted to be a Stay-at-Home Mommy (which I am), a supportive wife (which I am), a loving sibling (which I am), and a loving daughter (which I am)…which is why my mind keeps putting me in checkmate by saying, “You have everything you ever wanted… why push it and try for more? How will you balance your home with a business? How will you care for your husband? How will you make time for your kids?” It is those moments where fear starts really knocking at my door.
With that being said, I ended up spending the entire weekend thinking about this subject. What fear is, what common fears are, and how it affects different kinds of people. Through this process, I was finally able to muster up enough courage to no longer allow this emotion to get the better of me. How did I do this you may ask? Simply, by deciding to put all TRUST in me, so that I will be able to answer any knock at my door with a smile and with love. You see, the truth is that fear is constantly knocking at our doors if you really take time to listen. We can either choose to ignore that it’s there and just keep pressing on, or we can finally stand up with all that we are and open the door to invite fear in!
That is what I have chosen to do. I have decided to walk straight up to my door, open it up, and invite fear inside. I am going to ‘trust’ that this feeling knocking means I truly am on to something with my business…I am going to love the crap out of this scary emotion until it’s so full of love it has no choice but to love me back…I am going to put all my light towards the fear, and whatever else walks through my door, that it will be overrun with the warmth of which I am.
I have decided right here and now, to no longer live life by constantly ‘exiting stage right.’ Instead, I choose to harness the gifts provided to me and get to gettin’ when it comes to sharing my message with all of you!
Since I have made this declaration to myself and to the universe, I am overrun with pure joy for what lies ahead and am excited to have ‘fear’ along for the ride. Maybe, just maybe, I can finally teach IT a thing or two about how the soul really works!
What would you do, if you knew you wouldn’t fail? What would you do, if fear no longer conquered your life?
(Jaimie Schultz , a/k/a Pajamas, is a fun-loving, passionate, adventure seeker who loves life and loves helping others see how much they should love theirs. She is passionate about all things mystical and out of her control. You can visit her website at www.pajamasnotebook.com)
(If you would like to contribute an article you have authored to the Guest Column, please submit it to our Managing Editor, Lisa McCormack, for possible publication in this space. Not all submissions can be published, due to the number of submissions and sometimes because of other content considerations, but all are encouraged. Send submissions to Lisa@TheGlobalConversation.com. Please label the topic: “Guest Column.”)
NEALE: Why does it take so much time for me to create the reality I choose?
GOD: For a number of reasons. Because you do not believe you can have what you choose. Because you do not know what to choose. Because you keep trying to figure out what’s “best” for you. Because you want guarantees ahead of time that all your choices will be “good.” And because you keep changing your mind!
NEALE: Let me see if I understand. I shouldn’t try to figure out what’s best for me?
GOD: “Best” is a relative term, depending on a hundred variables. That makes choices very difficult. There should be only one consideration when making any decision – Is this a statement of Who I Am? Is this an announcement of Who I Choose to Be?
All of life should be such an announcement. In fact, all of life is. You can allow that announcement to be made by Chance, or by Choice.
A life lived by Choice is a life of conscious action. A life lived by Chance is a life of unconscious reaction.
Reaction is just that — an action you have taken before. When you “re-act,” what you do is assess the incoming data, search your memory bank for the same, or nearly the same, experience, and act the way you did before. This is all the work of the Mind, not of your Soul.
Your Soul would have you search It’s “memory” to see how you might create a truly genuine experience of You in the Now Moment. This is the experience of “soul searching” of which you have so often heard, but you have to be literally “out of your mind” to do it.
When you spend your time trying to figure out what’s “best” for you, you are doing just that: spending your time. Better to save your time than to spend it wastefully.
It is a great time-saver to be out of your mind. Decisions are reached quickly, choices are activated rapidly, because your Soul creates out of present experience only, without review, analysis and criticism of past encounters.
Remember this: the Soul creates, the Mind reacts.
The Soul knows in its wisdom that the experience you are having in This Moment is an experience sent to you by God before you had any conscious awareness of it. This is what is meant by a “pre-sent” experience. It’s already on the way to you even as you are seeking it — for even before you ask, I shall have answered you. Every Now Moment is a glorious gift from God. That’s why it is called the present.
The Soul intuitively seeks the perfect circumstance and situation now needed to heal wrong thought and bring you the rightful experience of Who You Really Are.
It is the Soul’s desire to bring you back to God — to bring you home to Me.
It is the Soul’s intention to know Itself experientially — and thus to know Me. For the Soul understands that You and I are One, even as the Mind denies this truth, and the Body acts out this denial.
Therefore, in moments of great decision, be out of your Mind, and do some Soul searching instead.
The Soul understands what the Mind cannot conceive.
If you spend your time trying to figure out what’s “best” for you, your choices will be cautious, your decisions will take forever, and your journey will be launched on a sea of expectations.
If you are not careful, you will drown in your expectations.
NEALE: Whew! That’s quite an answer! But how do I listen to my soul? How do I know what I’m hearing?
GOD: The Soul speaks to you in feelings. Listen to your feelings. Follow your feelings. Honor your feelings.
NEALE: Why does it seem to me that honoring my feelings is precisely what has caused me to get into trouble in the first place?
GOD: Because you have labeled growth “trouble,” and standing still “safe.” I tell you this: your feelings will never get you into “trouble,” because your feelings are your truth.
If you want to live a life where you never follow your feelings, but where every feeling is filtered through the machinery of your Mind, go right ahead. Make your decisions based on your Mind’s analysis of the situation. But don’t look for joy in such machinations, nor for celebration of Who You Truly Are.
Remember this: true celebration is mindless.
If you listen to your Soul you will know what is “best” for you, because what is best for you is what is true for you.
When you act only out of what is true for you, you speed your way down the Path. When you create an experience based on your “now truth” rather than react to an experience based on a “past truth,” you produce a “new you.”
Why does it take so much time to create the reality you choose? This is why: because you have not been living your truth.
Know the truth, and the truth shall set you free.
Yet once you come to know your truth, don’t keep changing your mind about it. This is your Mind trying to figure out what’s “best.” Stop it! Get out of your Mind. Get back to your senses!
That is what is meant by “getting back to your senses.” It is a returning to how you feel, not how you think. Your thoughts are just that – thoughts. Mental constructions. “Made up” creations of your Mind. But your feelings – now they are real.
Feelings are the language of the Soul. And your Soul is your truth.
There. Now does that tie it all together for you?
Editor’s Note: If you would like to COMMENT on the above excerpt from Conversations with God – Book Two, please scroll down to the end of the red ancillary copy that appears just below, which has been placed here for First Time Readers…
If Conversations with God has touched your life in a positive way, you are one of millions of people around the world who have had such an experience. All of the readers of CWG have yearned to find a way to keep its healing messages alive in their life.
One of the best ways to do that is to read and re-read the material over and over again — and we have made it convenient and easy for you to do so. Come here often and enjoy selected excerpts from the Conversations with God cosmology, changed on a regular basis, so you can “dip in” to the 3,000 pages of material quickly and easily. We hope you have enjoyed the excerpt above, from Friendship with God.
Now, may we tell you about a very easy way that you can share these wonderful messages with others? Please keep reading…
If you believe that the messages in Conversations with God could inspire humanity to change its basic beliefs about God, about Life, and about Human Beings and their relationship to each other, leave those messages lying around.
Simply “forget” or “misplace” a copy of Conversations with God on a bench somewhere. At a bus stop, or a train station, or an airport—or actually on the bus, train, or plane. At a hairstyling salon, a doctor’s office, a chiropractor’s office, a park bench, or even just a bench on the street. Just leave a book lying around.
If everybody did this, the message of Conversations with God could “go viral” in a very short period of time. So you are invited to participate in the Book-On-A-Bench program and spread ideas that could create a new cultural story far and wide.
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ABOUT the author of Conversations with God…
Neale Donald Walsch is a modern day spiritual messenger whose words continue to touch the world in profound ways. With an early interest in religion and a deeply felt connection to spirituality, Neale spent the majority of his life thriving professionally, yet searching for spiritual meaning before experiencing his now famous conversation with God. His Conversations with God series of books has been translated into 37 languages, touching millions and inspiring important changes in their day-to-day lives.
Neale was born in Milwaukee to a Roman Catholic family that encouraged his quest for spiritual truth. Serving as his first spiritual mentor, Neale’s mother taught him not to be afraid of God, as she believed in having a personal relationship with the divine — and she taught Neale to do the same.
A nontraditional believer, Neale’s mother hardly ever went to church, and when he asked her why, she told Neale: “I don’t have to go to church — God comes to me. He’s with me and around me wherever I am.” This notion of God at an early age would later move Neale to transcend traditional views of organized religion.
By his late teens Neale’s involvement with spiritually-based teachings led him to begin dipping into a variety of spiritual texts, including the Bible, the Rig Veda, the Upanishads and Divine revelation according to Sri Ramakrishna. He noticed that when people became involved in organized religion they sometimes seemed less joyful and more angry, occasionally exhibiting behaviors of prejudice and separateness. Neale concluded that humanity’s collective experience of theology was not as positive as it was meant to be. It seemed to him that there was something missing in standard theological teachings; that they might contain very good lessons, he concluded, but that they might not be complete.
After graduating from high school, he enrolled at the University of Wisconsin at Milwaukee, but academic life could not hold his interest and he dropped out of college after two years to follow an interest in radio broadcasting that eventually led to a full-time position at the age of 19 at a small radio station far from his Milwaukee home, in Annapolis, Maryland.
Restless by nature and always seeking to expand his opportunities for self-expression, Neale in the years that followed became a radio station program director, a newspaper managing editor, public information officer for one of the nation’s largest public school systems, and, after moving to the West Coast, creator and owner of his own public relations and marketing firm. Moving from one career field to another, he could not seem to find occupational satisfaction, his relationship life was in constant turmoil, and his health was going rapidly downhill.
He had relocated in Oregon as part of a change-of-scenery strategy to find his way, but Fate was to provide more than a change of location. It produced a change in his entire life. One day a car driven by an elderly gentleman made a left turn directly into his path. Neale emerged from the auto accident with a broken neck. He was lucky to escape with his life.
Over a year of rehab threw him out of work. A failed marriage had already removed him from his home, and soon he couldn’t keep even the small apartment he’d rented. Within months he found himself on the street, homeless. It took him two weeks shy of a year to pull himself together and get back under shelter. He found a modest part-time job, once again in broadcasting, then worked his way into full time broadcasting, eventual landing a spot as a nationally syndicated radio talk show host.
He had seen the bottom of life living outside, gathering beer and soft drink cans in a park to collect the return deposit, but now his life seemed to be on the mend. Yet, once more, Neale felt an emptiness inside that he could not define, and the daily difficulties that everyone faces continued.
In 1992, following a period of deep despair, Neale awoke in the middle of a February night and wrote an anguished letter to God. “What does it take to make life work?” he angrily scratched across a yellow legal pad. “And what have I done to deserve a life of such continuing struggle?”
What followed has been well chronicled and widely discussed around the world. Neale says his questioning letter received a Divine answer. He tells us that he heard a voice just over his right shoulder—soft and warm, kind and loving, as he describes it—that offered a reply. Awestruck and inspired, he quickly scribbled the response onto a yellow legal pad he’d found on a coffee table before him.
More questions came, and as fast as they occurred to him, answers were given in the same gentle voice, which now seemed to have moved inside his head, but also seemed clearly beyond his normal thinking. Before he knew it, Neale found himself engaged in a two-way on-paper dialogue.
He continued this first “conversation” for hours, and had many more in the weeks that followed, always awakening in the middle of the night and being drawn back to his legal pad. Neale’s handwritten notes would later become the best-selling Conversations with God books. He says the process was “exactly like taking dictation,” and that the dialogue that was created in this way was published without alteration or editing. He also says that God is talking to all of us, all the time, and that he has come to understand that this experience is not unusual, nor does it make him in any way a special person or a unique messenger.
In addition to producing the With God series of books, Neale has published 18 other works, as well as many video and audio programs. Available throughout the world, seven of the Conversations with God books made the New York Times bestseller list, with Conversations with God: Book 1 occupying a place on that list for more than two-and-half years. Walsch’s books have sold more than 7.5 million copies worldwide and have been translated into 37 languages. Anecdotal evidence suggests that CWG is one of the most widely distributed hand-to-hand books ever published, with estimates that, on average, at least two people have read every copy purchased — meaning that something more than 15 million people worldwide have read the CWG messages.
The With God series has redefined God and shifted spiritual paradigms around the globe. In order to deal with the enormous response to his writings, Neale has created several global outreach projects dedicated to inspiring the world to help itself move from violence to peace, from confusion to clarity, and from anger to love revolving around their core messages.
The projects include: (1) the Conversations with God Foundation, an adult education outreach; (2) Humanity’s Team, a global spiritual activist outreach; (3) CWG for Parents, an outreach providing resources to those who wish to bring their children the messages of CWG; (4) the Changing Change Network, a CWG helping outreach to persons facing major life challenges; (5) The Global Conversation, an internet newspaper outreach relating the spiritual messages of CWG to the news of the day; and (6) CWG Connect, a multi-media communications outreach creating a worldwide CWG community featuring Video and Audio On-Demand services, together with ongoing personal interaction with the author of CWG. Access to all of these programs will be found at the gateway internet site: www.CWGPortal.com
Neale’s work has taken him from the steps of Machu Picchu in Peru to the steps of the Shinto shrines of Japan, from Red Square in Moscow to St. Peter’s Square in Vatican City to Tiananmen Square in Beijing.
Everywhere he has gone—from South Africa to Norway, Croatia to The Netherlands, the streets of Zurich to the streets of Seoul—Neale has found a hunger among the people to find a new way to live; a way to co-exist, at last, in peace and harmony, with a reverence for Life Itself in all its forms, and for each other. And he has sought to help them develop a new, expanded understanding of God, of life, and of themselves that allows them to create and experience this.
Neale’s latest book, The Only Thing That Matters, was published in October, 2012. He lives in Ashland, Oregon and is married to the American poet Em Claire (www.emclairepoet.com).
Should there be armed guards in our schools? Is the NRA right about that?
Let’s talk now in this space about “Enlightenment”—this elusive magical mystical experience for which everyone seems to be reaching and for which everyone seems to have a yearning, and for which every one seems to be searching. And I understand the reasons for the search, because if we all were enlightened one presumes that our lives would be better than they are now, when we are presumably unenlightened.
In addition, it occurs to me that if all of us were enlightened relatively quickly, the whole world would be different and we would experience life in another way. Presumably with less turmoil, with less stress, with less conflict, for sure, I would imagine, with less sadness and anger and less violence and much less of all the things that make our lives sad and disjointed and unhappy in these days and times.
So humanity searches for Enlightenment and we have been searching for Enlightenment from the beginning of time, ever since we became consciously aware of the fact that it was possible to be Enlightened—whatever that is.
We have not only been searching for Enlightenment, we have been searching as well for a definition of Enlightenment, because we can’t get to that destination until we know where we are going. And so the first step for most human beings has been to try to define what Enlightenment is, or what it looks like, or feels like, or tastes like, or what it is like to experience that. And then, after we have that clear, after we know what our destination is, then we can try to figure out what would it take to get from where we are to where we want to be.
And there is this rush to Enlightenment that I observe that humanity, or a portion of humanity, is engaged in. And many say that they know how to get there and they know how to get you there. And so we see many, many “Paths to Enlightenment” that are suggested, recommended, created, expressed, experienced, shared, and put into the space of our collective lives. Masters of every shape and size and color have been creating a way to be enlightened for millennia.
Paramahansa Yogananda said that he knew a way to Enlightenment. The Buddha said that he knew a way to Enlightenment. Maharishi Mahesh Yogi says that he knows a way to Enlightenment. Sai Baba says that he knows a way to Enlightenment. In their own way, Jesus the Christ and Abu Al-Qasim Muhammad ibn Abd Allah ibn Abd Al-Muttalib ibn Hashim—Muhammad—said that they knew the way to Enlightenment.
Now the interesting thing here is that the followers of all of these Masters have insisted that their Master was right about that, that their way was the best way and the fastest way. Maybe not the only way, but the fastest way and, therefore, you needed to take that way. There was a great urgency. You needed to become Catholic or you needed to take Transcendental Meditation or you needed to learn Tai Chi, or you needed to raise your vibrational rate, or your needed to change your brain, or, for heaven sake, change something. And not some time, but right now, immediately, this month.
You needed to join this group or do that process or read this book or be baptized or be un-baptized or do whatever it is that you have been told by your particular master or monk is the fastest, quickest way for you to get to where all of us want to go—which is the place called “enlightenment,” “awareness,” “higher consciousness,” or “vibrational harmony.”
The brain is now the latest path, the latest route, everyone is talking about. It is about moving your energy, your focus, your awareness, your presence, your essence, the vibration of Who You Are, from the brain stem to the frontal lobe. Many people are teaching this now. Many people are talking about actual science, physical science, brain chemistry, as a path to this thing we call Enlightenment.
All of that is wonderful. That is just terrific, and it gives me great hope for humanity. But there is something we have to look at here. There is a pitfall here, a detour, a time-waster. And even a danger, if we choose to damage others with it. The danger of this business of Enlightenment is two-fold. The first danger is thinking that there is something specific that you have to do in order to get there, and that if you don’t do that, you can’t get there. The second danger is thinking that your way to get there is the fastest, best way to do it.
And I want to pick up on that in my next entry. For now, what is your path to Enlightenment? Have you tried any particular path? What has been your experience?
Has humanity lost True North on its moral compass?
The whole idea of “wrong doing” is part of humanity’s cosmology of life. We really do think that there is such a thing as Right and Wrong. After all, God has told us so. Our religions have told us so. Our parents have told us so. Our culture has told us so. Our societies around the world have made it clear that some things are Right and some things are Wrong.
Yet now here comes a new theology arising out of the Conversations with God series of books which tells us, in one of its most provocative statements, that “there is no such thing as Right and Wrong.” And the Mind begs to know, how can this be true? Are we to simply abandon all of the understandings that all of humanity holds all of the time?
No, my own Mind said, when I first heard this: Surely Right and Wrong must exist at some level. Surely there must be some guidepost, some yardstick, some standard or criterion with which we can measure or determine whether particular choices and behaviors are appropriate or inappropriate, are good or bad, are best taken or best ignored.
A remarkable post here a while ago from a reader named Carol Bass has ignited this series of articles about the state of humanity’s spirituality today.
In this series, I am attempting to respond directly to what Carol had to say in a striking entry that, to me, seemed to perfectly frame the way so many people are holding their reality today. I believe that Carol’s comments deserve serious and complete responses. So Carol, here we go again…as we continue to look deeply at the observations you offered.
In my last entry here in reply to you, I quoted your comment that…
“It seems that so many have turned their back on what is right and what is wrong. The ten commandments according to the bible have become just another thing to cast off as just someone’s religious beliefs but not necessarily truth.”
The human race seems to agree, Carol. People have stuck to their guns about this—and I mean that quite literally—for many, many years. We are absolutely certain that there is such a thing as Right and Wrong, and we are absolutely sure that we are right about that.
The difficulty and the problem has been that our ideas of Right and Wrong change from time to time, from place to place, and from culture to culture. The result: what one person or culture says is Right, another person or culture says is Wrong. And this is the source of more than a small or trivial amount of the conflict and violence, killing and war that we have seen on the planet—much of it, ironically, in God’s name.
This article is Part V of an ongoing series:
LAYING THE GROUNDWORK FOR TOMORROW
Not only can we not seem to be able to agree on what is Right and Wrong, we can’t even agree to disagree about this. We don’t seem capable of observing our differences and calling them simply that. We apparently feel the need to make each other wrong for holding views different from ours.
We can’t even agree to openly explore the topics on which our beliefs diverge, with all possibilities on the table, with compromises at least considered. No, there can be no compromises when we are right. One does not compromise one’s principles, one does not bargain with the devil—and we have already demonized each other, not just each other’s views, so there you have it. We are left with our disagreements and our absolute inability to overcome them.
Worse yet, we are left with our righteousness about them. We imagine we are so right about what is Right and Wrong that we are willing to belittle others, to criticize others, to persecute others, to judge and punish others, to attack others and even to kill others—all of which we would consider Wrong if others did it to us. The interesting thing about Right is that it is always on our side.
The problem here, of course, is with the model of the world. CWG famously made the statement that “no one does anything inappropriate, given their model of the world.” It is this model that tells us that things are morally right and morally wrong—and, billions believe, that it is God who has said so. If God says that something is Right or Wrong, who are we to contradict that, or even to question it?
So our model of the world leaves no room for discussion, no room for debate, no room for exploration of any possibility other than what we have been told and commanded by the God of our understanding.
There would be no problem with this if we could be certain that our understanding of what God has said is Right and Wrong is “right.” But what if it’s “wrong”? Or, at least, incomplete?
Even casual observation informs us, Carol, that,with regard to What God Said about what’s Right and what’s Wrong, we can’t get things straight on this planet from one culture to the next, or even from one moment in history to the next. What, then, to do? How to resolve this problem?
The answer is to build a new model of the world, based on a new understanding, brought to us by Tomorrow’s God. And that new understanding is that there is no such thing as Right and Wrong, there is only What Works and What Does Not Work, given what it is we are trying to do.
Dare we? Dare we use this New Model as a universal device for determining our actions, for making our choices, for taking particular decisions?
I want to explore more of what Carol Bass had to say in her post, and will do so in our next entry here, as The Carol Bass Dialogue continues…
(EDITOR’S NOTE: Much of the commentary in the column above comes from What God Said, the latest book from Neale Donald Walsch, to be published by Penguin Putnam in October.)
Today’s column is a bit unique in that I’m posting synopses of a series of emails between a personal friend and myself. I thought our exchange would have more impact than if I distilled it into a traditional advice column Q&A. “Yolanda” is a beautiful young Positive Music singer-songwriter here in Nashville who has been a vegan for many years. When she informed me of her decision to have a hysterectomy earlier this year I was shocked because it just didn’t seem like her style. She said she was at peace with the decision, though, having done some deep spiritual work around it. The conversation starts a few weeks later…
A: How are you feeling? 100% yet?
Y: Well, the pathology revealed early cancer. I know I made the right decision to have the hysterectomy! I see a GYN oncologist tomorrow, but I remain confident that the cancer is all out of my body. I am receiving the healing thoughts of so many amazing people, I have no choice but to be perfectly healthy! I really do feel better and better every day. Got back onstage for the first time Saturday and it was wonderful. 🙂
A: Wow, Yolanda, thank God you listened to your Inner Voice. Would you like for me to teach you how to have your own Conversations With God so you’ll always have access to your Soul’s higher guidance? It works miracles in Greg’s and my lives.
Y: Yes, please! 🙂
A: For now, I want you to do Neale’s video version of the “How To Have Your Own Conversation With God” process online. I taught this process at the Music City Center for Spiritual Living a couple of weeks ago and won’t be doing it again in town for awhile and don’t want you to have to wait.
1. Go to: www.cwg.tv
2. Click on “SUBSCRIBE NOW” at the top of the page. They have a “pay as you can plan” so that anyone can have access to it, regardless of their financial situation.
3. Go back to cwg.tv and log in with your user name and password.
4. Click on the “Special Programs” tab.
5. Select the top option: “Have your own Conversation With God”.
One other thing I want you to do: listen to my song “Thankful Offering” every day for six months, closing your eyes and allowing yourself to feel the deep-seated truth of your health and healing. Being grateful now brings you more to be grateful for. That’s why prayers of gratitude are the most powerfully creative.
Y: I haven’t had a chance to look at this yet, but thank you SO MUCH, Annie. I went to a GYN oncologist yesterday and she wants to go back in and take my ovaries, even though there is no actual proof that there is cancer there. As you can imagine, I am extremely reluctant to do this, but I have a lot to consider. I believe that my body is free of cancer at this time, but what if I’m wrong? It’s a huge decision and I have a lot of searching to do, both literally and spiritually.
A: Thank you for sharing this with me, Yolanda. Your Soul knows what is best here, so that is the perfect question to ask in a conversation with God: “What is highest and best for me regarding having my ovaries removed?” Be ready to write down whatever comes through and don’t censor it! A CWG is simply accessing the knowledge of the Universe via your Soul.
What is the reason they want to remove your healthy ovaries? Is it because you don’t want to do chemo?
I am here for you through any and all of this you want me to be. I adore you, Yolanda, and want to help in any way that might feel right for you.
Y: Well, the cancer they found in my uterus hasn’t been staged yet. The oncologist hasn’t even viewed the slide yet, but she will do so with her colleagues on Tuesday. There is a chance that it spread before they got the uterus out, so she wants to cover all bases. I really don’t care to have another surgery and I was THRILLED that I got to keep my ovaries after the first one. We didn’t know there was cancer present until after the surgery was done, which is why I was referred to a specialist.
I’m not convinced I should have to go into early menopause and go under the knife again just because we’re not sure. Hence the reason I need to do some soul-searching and a lot of research before I make any decisions.
A: One message I got in a CWG the other day was this, and I thought it was so profound, I printed it out and put it up on my fridge:
Listen to your own songs.
Read your own writing.
Follow your own advice.
If you did that with your song, “Love All”, what would that look like? Could you love the situation you are in now, knowing it could only be happening for your greater growth and good? Could you love the cancer that was in your body? Could you love any cancerous cells that might be there now? Could you communicate love to them, thank them, then invite them to return to the Oneness from whence they came, letting them know they have served their purpose in your life?
Not easy questions, and certainly not easy assignments, yet they may be in your highest and best interest to work toward…
Y: Mmmmm. Thank you.
A: Does that sound crazy or does it make sense? It felt kind of inspired coming out so I didn’t second guess it…
Y: Totally makes sense to me. Thank you for not censoring!
A: May I have your permission to post our email conversation as my weekly advice column in Neale’s online newspaper? Who knows who all it might help.
Y: You have my permission. 🙂 Thank you, again.
CT scan looks good, so yay! I’m breaking up with cancer. I learned a lot from it, but now it’s time we parted ways. 🙂
A: WOOHOO!!!!!!! Yes, as in all good break-ups, send it lovingly on its way…
(Annie Sims is the Global Director of CWG Advanced Programs, is a Conversations With God Coach and author/instructor of the CWG Online School. To connect with Annie, please email her at Annie@TheGlobalConversation.com
(If you would like a question considered for publication, please submit your request to: Advice@TheGlobalConversation.com where our team is waiting to hear from you.)
With the odds of beating addiction and leading a productive life so low, the question has to be asked: Why do some recover? What is it that those few people are doing that opens up the door for an addiction-free life?
There are many factors involved, Divine intervention being one of them! But overall, the current path showing the best results are the 12-step programs. “So what are they doing that other programs are not?” you may ask. And I am here to tell you what I believe it is.
The fundamental aspect of the 12-step programs is that you do not go it alone. One of the very first suggestions to a newcomer is to get a sponsor. It is strongly suggested that the person you choose to be your sponsor has at least one year in the program, goes to meetings regularly, has a sponsor them self, and inspires you to stick around. This person should be of the same sex; or in cases of gay or lesbian, they should be the opposite sex. Many deep emotional processes will be encountered in this relationship, and having a romantic interest would destroy the sanctity of the sponsor.
It is well-known in the 12-step world that if you ignore this suggestion, the chances of your gaining long-term sobriety are bleak. Addiction is a disease of denial and deception. And who knows better if you are living in denial or deceit than someone who is all too familiar with those states of being? The old saying “You can’t bullcrap a bullcrapper” (insert your own profanity if you so choose) really applies here.
“An addict alone is in bad company”
Life was not intended to be lived in solitary. We live in the Realm of Relativity and we need others to help us shape our perspective. This is especially true to the recovering person as they have spent nearly their entire existence telling lies. This reminds me of a 12-step joke. Please indulge me here….
“Do you know how to tell if a newcomer is lying?” says one 12-stepper to another? “Yes,” the other person says, “when their lips are moving!”
Sometimes recovery is down and dirty and you have to assume the worst in order to help someone get through a tough time. The one thing old-timers in the rooms know, pulling punches never helps anyone. You have to be straight, direct, blunt, and willing to alienate someone if your gut instincts tell you they are up to their old tricks.
This is the area that the 12-step programs have nailed down perfectly. We do not need to have people in our lives that tell us what we want to hear. What everyone needs are people surrounding them who will speak their truth at all times. Compulsive behaviors, addiction, and deception cannot be practiced in the light of honesty and openness; this is what gives way to long-term sobriety. The Tenth Step says something profound:
“We continue to take personal inventory, and when we are wrong, promptly admit it.”
Wow! Imagine the world for just a moment if everyone used just that tiny part of the 12-step program in their daily life! Nevermind the humility it takes to do that, but think about the amazing conversations that we would be having with each other. Humans would bond together like molecules of water, ebbing and flowing with purpose through life. Some may argue that there is no “right and wrong.” And I will give you that. So let’s change the wording slightly:
“We continue to take personal inventory. And when we become aware that something we are doing is not an expression of who and what we are at our core, we promptly seek to make the changes necessary to bring ourselves back into alignment.”
Let’s face it, we are human. And “to err is human.” This is the beauty of the Realm of the Relative. We always have events occurring that could use improvement. This is a process of evolution we are in here, and we have many opportunities to move along that path together. Every opportunity to express ourselves in our highest expression moves us to a place of greater understanding. By purposefully being aware of our own behavior, how it is sent, and how it is received, we offer ourselves and the other the space for expansion.
(Kevin McCormack is a Conversations with God Life Coach, a Spiritual helper on www.changingchange.net, and an Addictions recovery advisor. You can visit his website for more information at www.Kevin-Spiritualmentor.com To connect with Kevin, please email him at Kevin@theglobalconversation.com)
Recently, I received a phone call from a friend who desired a safe space to share an experience of being talked at, rather than talked to. She was visiting with a family member, catching up on life, and discussing a variety of topics when an opinion-pusher invited themselves into their conversation to set them both straight about everything they were wrong about. The negative outcome my friend felt from the exchange was not so much the opinions themselves but rather the need of the other person to be right about their point of view, rather than being willing to discuss their differing ideas.
We all have a point of view, an idea of how things should be, and a right to express those ideas. Yet how we choose to communicate our intention behind what we are saying goes a long way to having our expressions received. I have observed in the world today that most feel an overwhelming need to share their opinions, whether they are helpful or not. In my friend’s case, no thought was given to how the uninvited communication would land or whether or not they would even be interested in discussing differing points of view at the time. Had the Buttinski asked to join the conversation, instead of just barfing opinion all over them, a much different outcome could have been created.
For me, real communication has nothing to do with being right; it has to do with being heard. Being right turns communication into debate or, worse, argument. Debate can be healthy, for often that is how we learn and grow. Debate causes us to think about issues, where we stand, and why we believe what we do. Being right is where communication ends and righteousness begins. At least in debate one listens to the other point of view before offering a counterpoint or a positional response. Real communication, however, has zero need to be right about its point of view. Healthy communication allows all points of view to be heard and then the freedom for the participants to agree or disagree without consequence.
For example, over the years of working with the Conversations with God Foundation, I have received some rather confrontational communications around religious belief. Because I was listed on the website as “Reverend JR,” I would sometimes receive mail from people attempting to “save my lost soul.” It is held by some that CwG is of the “devil” and those of us who find value in it would soon see the error of our ways in hell. According to a few of my concerned “soul savers,” I, as a reverend, would find myself in a “special place of hell” for leading my flock away from the one true savior.
I used to respond to these letters with the thought that surely we could discuss our ideas about God in a way that could be productive and beneficial for both of us but that the need to be right thing far too often got in the way. I quickly realized that with most of these letters, the writers were not interested in having a dialogue, but rather a monologue. There is no conversation in a monologue and no opportunity to grow if you think you already have all the answers. My interest in finding common ground and expanding our mutual understanding of God was, in the end, lost to this “need to be right” obsession.
Being a lifelong student, I love to converse with people from all over the world, from different backgrounds, religions, and all points of view. I learn so much about myself, about life, and about God from these conversations. I decided long ago that I would honor all faiths and all points of view and let go of the need to be right about anything, especially for someone else. Instead, I would trust that each person could and would decide what works for them and that there is great value in discussing ideas and listening to alternate points of view. It is amazing what a conversation can create.
It is from this place that the beginning of conversations that could change the world reside. The necessary ingredients of these conversations begins with respect and tolerance. My Father use to say that respect and tolerance would heal the world. Think about it. What would happen tomorrow if we all awoke without the need to be right?
What if no one felt the need to be right about anything they currently held as a truth? What if each of us felt secure enough within to look at our own beliefs and even became willing to challenge those beliefs by listening to alternate points of view? What if we were willing to take a fresh look at all of our deeply held ideas to see if more could be revealed through inquiry?
For example, is humanity convinced that God, if there is a God, has said all there is to say about life? If so, why hasn’t religion solved the major challenges that face humanity by now? Why are the greatest numbers of us still suffering? Perhaps there is more to be communicated about God and about life. Perhaps there is more to know, the knowing of which would change everything.
It takes great courage and strength to stand in the place of “I am willing to be wrong about that.” Freedom lives on the other side of this equation. For if you lack the need to be right, nothing needs to happen for you to be at peace.
You see, if the above statement was true for you, your happiness meter would go off the chart. It would also be the end of many of the circumstances and conditions that do not work in our world today. We are the world’s circumstances in motion. What we choose every day affects the whole of us.
Could we all benefit from letting go of the need be right? You bet. The need to be right seems to me to be one of our greatest addictions and one of the reasons we are evolving so slowly.
When I look out upon the landscape of humanity, whether historically or now, the need to be right has been the cause of so much pain, tragedy, and heartache. It isn’t just God or religion. Look at every system in the world today. The need to be right has shut down real communication in favor of positions and arguments that continue to lead to things like war.
The media is responsible for some of it, for sure, with Facebook, reality TV, and opinion-driven product blasting points-of-view content at you 24/7. But we have to take responsibility for our participation in it. Energy grows where energy goes. Stop participating in these systems and watch how quickly they will change.
The tool required to let go of the need to be right is critical thinking. Critical thinking is not a skill taught in school; it is developed by people who become willing to step back and consider differing points of view, by those willing to engage in real conversation, inquiry, and dialogue. This is the missing link in our human condition right now. This is the thing that could change everything.
Critical thinking develops this kind of communication that could and would change the world. What is required is the ability to see that what works for you may not work for another. Are you willing to consider the possibility that your way may not be THE WAY but, rather, simply another way? The statement from Conversations with God applies here perfectly: “Ours is not a better way, ours is merely another way.”
This kind of thinking applied, this kind of communication expressed, this kind of willingness to be open to new possibilities and new thoughts will be used by the people who do change the world. Why not let that be you?
PS: I’m willing to be wrong about all of it!
(J.R. Westen, D.D. is a Holistic Health & Spiritual Counselor who has worked and presented side-by-side with Neale Donald Walsch for over a decade. He is passionate about helping individuals move beyond their emotional and spiritual challenges, transforming breakdowns into breakthroughs. His counseling and coaching provides practical wisdom and guidance that can be immediately incorporated to shift one’s experience of life.
As is true for most impactful teachers, J.R.’s own struggles and triumphs inspired him to find powerful ways of helping others. Sober since June 1, 1986, J.R.’s passion for helping individuals move through intense life challenges drove him to also specialize in Addiction and Grief Recovery.
J.R. currently shares his gift of counseling & coaching with individuals from around the world through the Wellness Center, Simply Vibrant, located on Long Island N.Y. In addition, he operates “Change House” a place where people come to transform. He also works with Escondido Sobering Services and now serves as the Director for the Conversations with God Foundation. He can be contacted at JR@CWG.ORG or JR@theglobalconversation.com, or to book an appointment, write firstname.lastname@example.org.)
I have a co-worker who I just don’t get along with. I do my best to be nice, have tried the “kill her with kindness” approach, but I have to admit I am getting sucked into the drama of it all more and more. I don’t like having a relationship like this in my life, I sometimes dread going to work because I don’t want to have to interact with her, and I certainly don’t like the way I act sometimes because of it (gossiping, complaining, acting less than my highest self). I’m not exactly sure what the problem is, I think our personalities just don’t match, but it’s beginning to drive me crazy because it’s taking up so much of my energy! How do I make this problem go away?
On this day of your life, I believe God wants you to know…
…that you cannot hope to solve any problem using the
same energy that created the problem.
Whether it’s the endless wars in the world or the
unending quarrels and fighting in your own home, the
problem is the same: conflicting energy. If you want
to change the outcome, change the energy.
The extraordinary aspect of this solution is that you
do not have to wait for the other party in order
to do it.
Do you receive the daily emails from Neale? If not, I highly recommend them, you can sign up at www.nealedonaldwalsch.com. Anyway, the above quote is from the email sent out today, actually, and I believe it addresses your question perfectly. In other words, you cannot fix a problem from inside the problem. You must move outside of it, and actually shift your attention away from it. This approach is difficult for most to understand, because it can appear to be avoidance, and we have been conditioned in our society to attack a problem head on.
I assure you that shifting your attention is actually not avoiding it. It’s “changing the energy”, as Neale articulates above. When we change the energy, we are giving ourselves access to more information, broader perspectives, and yes, solutions. And, as also articulated above, you do not have to wait for the other party in order to do it. This is another great demonstration of how you can always control your experience of something, even if you can’t control the event itself.
So how exactly do we change the energy? What does that look like?
It looks like shifting your attention to things that feel better, to things you can control. You may not be able to control what your co-worker says or does, but you can most certainly choose what you say and do. You may not be able to choose how your co-worker perceives you, but you can most certainly choose how you perceive her. Instead of focusing your attention on what you don’t like about her, consciously focus your attention on what you do like about her. And I get it, that may be difficult at first, but I urge you to give it a try. Even the smallest of things, do you like her hair color? Perhaps she has a nice smile, or she actually does her job really well. Furthermore, shift your attention to things you like about yourself, who are you being when you feel you are being your higher self? What are you grateful for in your life? In your job? What things in your life are occurring that you wouldn’t label as “a problem”?
All of these things, including other things such as meditating, journaling, spending time with people you love, doing things you love to do, help shift the energy. And, while it may appear that you are not directly addressing the problem, you’re right, you’re not. In other words, you are no longer looking at it as a problem, and in time, it no longer is experienced as a problem. Trust me, I’ve seen it happen time and time again.
One more thought for you, Janelle: when you find yourself thinking about this co-worker, try just sending her positive, loving energy, just as she is. Silently bless her, and show her the greatest demonstration of love possible by allowing her to walk the path her soul has chosen to walk at this point. Remember, in the largest picture, your soul and her soul have already made an agreement to help each other out in this lifetime, to give each other a certain experience of yourselves through one another. For a deeper explanation of this, check out “The Little Soul and the Sun”, by Neale Donald Walsch.
(Nova Wightman is a CWG Life Coach, as well as the owner and operator of Go Within Life Coaching, www.gowithincoaching.com, specializing in helping individuals blend their spirituality with their humanity in a way that makes life more enjoyable, easy, and fulfilling. She can be reached at Nova@theglobalconversation.com. )
(If you would like a question considered for publication, please submit your request to: Advice@TheGlobalConversation.com, where our team is waiting to hear from you.)
In high school, I have been called plenty of names. Critical, controversial, outspoken, eccentric, just to name a few. But recently, there has been one name that has stood out from the rest. Last week, I was called “that self-centered bitch”. Though I was hardly surprised, this one was definitely a bit unnerving. Being a writer on spirituality, having that title was certainly NOT in my grandest vision of the greatest vision of myself. But after some careful contemplation, I realized that there is more truth to it than I thought.
So, yes, I confess. I am self-centered. But is this really so bad?
No. There is absolutely no problem with being self-centered. When we are self-centered, we are literally centered (or in other terms, grounded) in our Sense of Self. By introspecting everything we chose to be, chose to do, and chose to have, we create a very strong definition of Who We Are. In essence, being centered in the self is merely living and thinking in the most elevated idea of our highest thought. By continuously living in our highest understanding of self-respect, self-esteem, and self-actualization, we have faith in ourselves. Through this internal trust, we have the confidence in our ability to enjoy life as a creative experience. Who doesn’t desire this?
Furthermore, being self-centered is exactly what we should be in high school. During our teenage years, our sense of identity is truly in the greatest fluctuation. As we journey to figure out for ourselves just Who We Really Are, we join clubs, groups, and cliques to create some type of name for ourselves. One of the greatest pitfalls among teens today is letting their new social group control their definition of their identity. And as teens become dependent on outside groups to define who they are, they lose sight of their own story – of their purpose and their potential. If these teens are not self-centered, then they let these external forces shape their names, their decisions, and their history. Everyone is familiar with the story of “the good kid” who hung around “the wrong people” and then became “the bad kid” (in the most subjective sense, that is). Whether it be through the influence of drugs, alcohol, or peer pressure, looking for our identity solely in an outside group can lead to some truly destructive results.
If we teenagers decide to be self-centered, we already have our identity grounded on the strong base of our Innermost Beliefs. In this sense, we see external events, titles, and labels as an augmentation of Who We Are, instead of The Only Thing We Are. With such a sturdy foundation in ourselves, everything else is merely building upon ourselves.
However, there is a fine line between being self-centered and being self-fixated. As being self-centered is thinking the highest possible thoughts about ourselves, being self-fixated is not realizing that there is anything beyond or above that. As teens become self-fixated, egotism begins to rise and dominate the personality factor. When we are self-centered, we can still look out into the universe and know we still have far to go on our journey. When we are self-fixated, we simply cannot get past that, seeing nothing more and nothing less.
So go on and say that I am self-centered. I’ll take it as a compliment to my spiritual evolution. And you should too.
(Lauren is a Feature Editor of The Global Conversation. She lives in Wood Dale, IL, and can be reached at Lauren@TheGlobalConversation.com)