{"id":1520,"date":"2012-10-11T03:27:21","date_gmt":"2012-10-11T03:27:21","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.theglobalconversation.com\/blog\/?p=1520"},"modified":"2012-10-11T03:34:57","modified_gmt":"2012-10-11T03:34:57","slug":"if-only-you-were-this-then-i-could-be-that","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.theglobalconversation.com\/blog\/?p=1520","title":{"rendered":"If only you were &#8216;this,&#8217; then I could be &#8216;that&#8217;"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>By the time Jenny Lee was 28 years old, she&#8217;d already had 26 plastic surgeries:<\/p>\n<p>Breast implants\u00a0(twice)<br \/>\nCheek implants<br \/>\nChin implant<br \/>\nLip implants (3 times)<br \/>\nNose jobs\u00a0(3 times)<br \/>\nBreast lift (3 times)<br \/>\nLiposuction on her arms, hips, thighs, stomach &amp; knees<br \/>\nA full body lift<br \/>\nBotox\u00a0injections<br \/>\nVeneers<\/p>\n<p><strong><em>Why?<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Her answer to this one-word question is simply, \u201cBecause my husband told me that my breasts were too small and my nose was too big.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>In an effort to achieve her perception of perfection &#8211; (including a belief that these choices would somehow become the source of her partner\u2019s happiness) &#8211; Jenny Lee attempted to literally recreate her body, thus hoping to recreate her reality, through a painful journey of surgery after surgery after surgery.<\/p>\n<p>The cruel twist in this story is that after Jenny had the breast enlargements and the plethora of other procedures, instead of finally receiving what she desired most, her husband\u2019s love and affection, she was met with a new unwelcome response from him:\u00a0 resentment and jealousy\u2026 because now, ironically, she was receiving too much attention from others.<\/p>\n<p>Reading this story about Jenny caused me to reflect upon why women &#8211; or anyone, for that matter &#8211; began perceiving themselves as <em>less than whole <\/em>and adopted belief systems which embraced the notion that certain conditions create happiness, not only within ourselves, but within others:\u00a0 \u201cIf I have thinner thighs or less wrinkles, I will be worthy of love\u201d\u2026&#8221;If he was taller and had more hair, he would be perfect\u201d\u2026.&#8221;If she would look <em>this<\/em> way, I would feel <em>that<\/em> way.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>We cram our feet into uncomfortable shoes.<\/p>\n<p>We stuff our legs into binding pantyhose and hip-slimming Spanx.<\/p>\n<p>We pluck our eyebrows and color our hair and bleach our teeth.<\/p>\n<p>We only feel pretty when we have make-up on&#8230;and we have become experts at &#8220;Photoshopping&#8221; out our perceived flaws.<\/p>\n<p><em>Why are we doing this?<\/em><\/p>\n<p><em>What is it that we are imagining ourselves to need? \u00a0Or be lacking? \u00a0Or simply not remembering?<\/em><\/p>\n<p>\u201cCommunion with God\u201d says &#8220;need&#8221; is not only the <em>first <\/em>illusion, but the <em>grandest <\/em>illusion, the illusion upon which ALL other illusions are based. \u00a0The illusion of need\u00a0manifests in all areas of our lives, but it becomes particularly painful when it permeates the most sacred space of intimacy within a partnership of souls. \u00a0Some people feel unworthy to stand before their <em>beloved other<\/em> unclothed. \u00a0Some people withhold from their lover the most sensual physical experience of love. \u00a0Some people go so far as to undergo 26-plus cosmetic surgeries to &#8220;fix&#8221; what they think is &#8220;broke.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>What can we do to <em>change this<\/em>?<\/p>\n<p>As our society continues to shift and inch closer to the understandings and concepts held with the New Spirituality, will we remember that it is through the transformation of our thoughts about <em>Who We Really Are<\/em>, rather than our ideas about who we<em> <\/em>think we<em> should<\/em> be, that we will be presented the grandest opportunity to experience ourselves as whole and perfect\u2026.and as God?<\/p>\n<p>Or is it perhaps that an alteration of our physicality is just another path to a spiritual transformation?<\/p>\n<p>(Lisa McCormack is the Managing Editor &amp; Administrator of The Global Conversation.\u00a0 She is also a member of the Spiritual Helper team at <a href=\"http:\/\/www.changingchange.net\/\">www.ChangingChange.net<\/a>, a website offering emotional and spiritual support . \u00a0\u00a0To connect with Lisa, please e-mail her at <span style=\"color: #0000ff;\"><a title=\"Lisa@TheGlobalConversation.com\" href=\"mailto:Lisa@theglobalconversation.com\" target=\"_blank\"><span style=\"color: #0000ff;\">Lisa@TheGlobalConversation.com<\/span><\/a><\/span>.)<\/p>\n<!-- AddThis Advanced Settings generic via filter on the_content --><!-- AddThis Share Buttons generic via filter on the_content -->","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>By the time Jenny Lee was 28 years old, she&#8217;d already had 26 plastic surgeries: Breast implants\u00a0(twice) Cheek implants Chin implant Lip implants (3 times) Nose jobs\u00a0(3 times) Breast lift (3 times) Liposuction on her arms, hips, thighs, stomach &amp; knees A full body lift Botox\u00a0injections Veneers Why? Her answer to this one-word question is [&hellip;]<!-- AddThis Advanced Settings generic via filter on get_the_excerpt --><!-- AddThis Share Buttons generic via filter on get_the_excerpt --><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":4,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[157],"tags":[235,230,4,234,226,231,193,233,227,232,229,52,228],"class_list":["post-1520","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-romance-and-relationships","tag-breast-implants","tag-communion-with-god","tag-conversations-with-god","tag-illusion-of-need","tag-jenny-lee","tag-lisa-mccormack","tag-new-spirituality","tag-partnerships","tag-plastic-surgery","tag-relationships","tag-shame","tag-the-global-conversation","tag-transformation"],"acf":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.theglobalconversation.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1520","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.theglobalconversation.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.theglobalconversation.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.theglobalconversation.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/4"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.theglobalconversation.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1520"}],"version-history":[{"count":8,"href":"https:\/\/www.theglobalconversation.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1520\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1540,"href":"https:\/\/www.theglobalconversation.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1520\/revisions\/1540"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.theglobalconversation.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1520"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.theglobalconversation.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1520"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.theglobalconversation.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1520"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}