That\u2019s right, I hear voices — four of them actually. \u00a0And tonight I recognized them and saw very clearly what was happening, and it started with a prayer.\u00a0 I prayed while laying in savasana after an inspiring yoga class.\u00a0 My prayer was a simple one, a typical one even.\u00a0 I knew I had to get this blog up. \u00a0And I am somewhat of an inspirational writer.\u00a0 What I mean by that is when something in my life inspires me, the thoughts come fast and furious. \u00a0When this happens, I need to get to the computer quickly or at the very least a pad and pen.<\/p>\n
This past week, I haven’t had the opportunity to let those things that I felt inspired to write about get written down or entered into the computer.\u00a0 My busy life was stringing out my current blog past when it was time to change it and I needed some inspiration.\u00a0 So I prayed. \u00a0I asked God in what I recognized was my voice, \u201cGod, please bring through me the words that those reading my blog this week are seeking to hear.\u201d\u00a0 I continued in my head with the invocation, although this one had a different voice, albeit it was still my voice. The inflection was not as strong and committed, and it stuttered a little.<\/p>\n
The prayer continued in this shaky voice, \u201cPlease, God, let this blog be of great service.\u201d<\/p>\n
This is where it became interesting. \u00a0Another voice almost simultaneously, yet seemingly behind the shaky voice, a higher pitched, tense, and uneasy voice, was saying, \u201cLet this be of great service to me as well.\u201d<\/p>\n
Just as that voice started to say that, another voice came in and chimed, \u201cYou can\u2019t ask for this to serve you!\u201d\u00a0 This voice was clearly different, as were all four of the voices, yet they were, strangely enough, all my voice.\u00a0 It was very clear to me while this was happening ,that these were all my thoughts with my different data attached to them surrounding what each statement was.<\/p>\n
This noticing of my thoughts, and the voices attached to them, was fairly unique to me.\u00a0 I have listened to the voices in my head many times and always wondered what was going on there.\u00a0 I have been intrigued about how many different levels there are in my mind. \u00a0And that kicked off another whole set of thoughts and voices.<\/p>\n
The thought process fascinated me, especially with the level of clarity and awareness in which it occurred.\u00a0 I quickly had the thought, \u201cThis is the blog!\u201d\u00a0 As soon as I made that decision, I had two simultaneous things going on in my head.<\/p>\n
The first was, \u201cDon\u2019t forget this!\u201d\u00a0 I began to repeat the topic over and over in my head so I would remember: \u201cI hear voices, I hear voices\u2026\u201d\u00a0 While repeating that mantra, my secondary thoughts were flying about, \u201cHow does this tie in to addiction?\u201d\u00a0 One voice said, \u201cYou can\u2019t write about something like that. \u00a0 What if it harms someone?\u201d\u00a0 While immediately another voice said, \u201cOh, my God, people who hear voices need to read this. \u00a0They need to know that maybe those voices are there to bring awareness to our thoughts.\u201d\u00a0 This very same voice said, \u201cYou must write this article.\u201d<\/p>\n
And so that conversation took place in my head in a two-minute span while laying on a floor in a 105 degree room, soaking wet after a ninety-minute yoga class where every aspect of my being was pushed to the limits. \u00a0This incredible insight happened because I took time for myself.\u00a0 I made time for me and only me to honor what God has given me, a beautiful mind capable of multi-layered thought, an incredible body that is able to do more than I ever give it credit for, and a soul in which to rely upon and seek wisdom, compassion, discipline, and insight from.<\/p>\n
You see, recovery is about always seeking greater insight into ourselves, the world around us, and to expand our consciousness of what we believe our Creator to be.\u00a0 If I seek to remain open, and never declare anything to be the ultimate truth, that leaves me with the power to recreate myself and my world at any moment.\u00a0 When you are in a state of mind that is seeking higher states of Divinity, there is no room for relapse.<\/p>\n
I understand that for some hearing voices is a sign of mental illness, and that should not be taken lightly, nor should it be made fun of.\u00a0 What I am encouraging people to do here is take a concept and think deeply on it.\u00a0 What I did only took two minutes and the feeling and inspiration was phenomenal.<\/p>\n