addiction
Sugar has been around for thousands of years in one form or another. People love sweet tastes and indulging in sugary treats. But there is a huge difference between using raw sugar cane stalks and using the white refined sugar that we are so familiar with. Refined sugar is so processed and concentrated that it doesn’t seem to be a food at all.
Sugar cane contains high concentrations of sucrose and is usually used to make refined sugar. Sugar cane looks like a thick stalk of bamboo, and the sap is stored in the stalk. A harvested stalk of sugar cane will yield 10-15% of its weight in sugar. Sugar cane is burned, harvested, chopped, cleaned, washed, and the juice extracted, filtered, and purified into a juice. The juice is boiled and evaporated into thick syrup, then crystallized, centrifuged, dried, and packaged. This all sounds fine until you take a closer look.
Sugar juice is purified using calcium hydroxide to coagulate particles. Then the clear juice is separated through a carbon sedimentation process before evaporating and boiling to reduce it to about 1/3 of its original volume. Sugar is crystallized by seeding it with sugar grains and mixing it with methylated spirit and glycerine to grow crystals. The crystals are separated by centrifugal force. You would think that the sugar is done now, but it is not. This raw sugar is then melted before refining into syrup, washing, and clarifying it with phosphoric acid and more calcium hydroxide. Then it is concentrated further by boiling again, and making white crystals. This all sounds like a science experiment to me, not a food preparation!
Ten pounds of sugar cane goes into one pound of white sugar. After processing and refining the sugar cane, there are no vitamins, minerals, or nutrients left in it. The extreme concentration of sugar causes huge spikes in your blood sugar – first by making it rise abnormally high and then by causing a large drop. This is why you might experience all kinds of health symptoms from eating sugar from hyperactivity, headaches, mood swings, depression, and fatigue. Concentrated sugar triggers the same part of the brain that is stimulated by addictive drugs. Sugar also causes diabetes, obesity, binge-eating, and fuels chronic inflammation and disease. Why do this to yourself?
Just for today, try to replace sugar with a natural non-chemical sweetener. I recommend honey, agave nectar, stevia, date sugar or coconut sugar! Once you switch to natural sweeteners, your taste buds will readjust and you will enjoy the natural flavors instead of the intense concentrated sugary taste.
(Beth Anderson is a certified Holistic Health Coach and founder of the Holistic Health Hotspot in Evansville, Indiana. She is also the author of “The Holistic Diet: Achieve Your Ideal Weight, Be Happy and Healthy for Life.” Beth received her training from the Institute for Integrative Nutrition. Beth is helping people improve their lives through nutrition and lifestyle education, health coaching, and by helping others to learn to make informed choices. Beth continues to spread understanding of the connection between body, mind, and spirit and encourages all to discern the truth about food, consumer products, environment, and life choices. You can find Beth on Facebook at http://www.facebook.com/HolisticHealthHotspot or email her at beth@holistichealthhotspot.com)
Regularly, I receive letters from people facing all sorts of life challenges. I am always inspired by those who have the courage to step outside of their comfort zone and reach out for help. In many cases, it is simply an act of love that drives them to look for solutions. For example, I receive letters from caring parents wanting to help guide their children who have lost their way. I was touched by a recent one and wanted to share our interaction. Of course, I have not included any personal information. These kinds of interactions are, unfortunately, very common, especially for those parents who deal with children that have become addicted. It is addiction that has become far too common and the subject of this week’s column.
Dear JR,
My two youngest children are addicted to opiates. I’ve known for two years about my son, who is in his twenties. Now I have just found out about my daughter’s addiction. She is 19. My son has been in treatment and 12-step programs and was sober, but now is using again. My daughter has been actively using now for about 6 months. She’s asking for help, wants to detox, as she has hopes of getting a job soon. I can’t say that 12 steps and counseling has “worked” for my son, and I can’t imagine how a forced 5-day medically monitored detox could cure my daughter. I’ve been reading Neale Donald Walsch’s books and the CwG Foundation newsletter for several months now. I read last week, “From the Director’s Chair” and see that you do this type of work, addiction counseling. Can you make any suggestions? Thanks – Susan
Hello Susan,
Thank you for your note. I feel the obvious care and concern you have for your children; no doubt with good reason. You may or may not be aware, addiction is the number one killer in America. Unfortunately, each year, more people die from pharmaceutical drugs than illicit drugs…an epidemic that is getting worse, not better. Often, well-intentioned medical professionals are prescribing medication and set into motion or solidify the undetected addict brain. In many cases, all one has to say is something like “I feel depressed,” and out comes the prescription pad. Not that there isn’t a time and place for such intervention and proper uses of medications for the properly diagnosed, but we are quickly becoming a nation of drug addicts.
All drugs have side effects, but for the addict, getting hooked is one of them. Giving drugs as a way to treat drug addicts has never made sense in my world view. There has to be another way. I have looked deeply at this problem, and the solutions offered and available today have little success. The reason is simple: Most do not include a holistic point of view; that is, they do not treat the whole being.
I believe that any treatment of disease, not just the disease of addiction, must have a holistic and natural approach to be successful. One must look for the underlying causes and conditions of addiction and what exists within the world of each addict. Addiction professionals must look not only at the physiology, but also the mental, emotional, and spiritual maladies that will also surely exist.
My goal in working with addicts is to remove all obstacles, real or imagined, that drive the addict to use. This includes all synthetics, as well as any other substances that can cause negative side effects in the human physiology…truly helping each addict to become clean. The chemistry in the addict brain must be managed with the proper intake of substances designed for the health of human beings…only nature provides this. Those who ignore diet for example, miss the terrible impact of things like refined sugars and how sugar negatively impacts brain chemistry and the nervous systems of all humans, not just addicts. What goes in the body affects the whole being, a far too often overlooked but simple remedy for dis-ease.
It is also important to be aware that addiction is a family disease; that is, everyone in the family plays a role in either addiction or recovery. Addiction and addicts themselves can’t survive without two things in place: Either co-dependency or enabling, or both combined, must be present for addiction to survive. Remove these two forms of survival mechanisms of addiction, and you go a long way in creating the space for healing the addiction itself. Said another way, disease can only survive in certain conditions, and the same is true for the disease of addiction.
Another essential ingredient that has to be present in order for recovery to be possible must come from the addict themselves. What is that? It’s the desire to recover. Short of lockdown, a person that lacks the desire to recover will remain stuck in their self-created hell until they become willing to change. However, with desire in place, and a willingness to become honest and follow through on the actions suggested, developing a path to sobriety becomes available. And perhaps more important, it creates the possibility of a life filled with purpose, passion, and joy, which can only be attained as a result of returning to the human being’s natural and spiritual path. This is the holistic point of view. This is a path that would benefit any human that walked it, not just those in recovery. This awakening can be seen as the gift of addiction itself; that is, the Soul uses challenges like addiction to awaken us to who we really are. That is what was true for me. Addiction was my greatest gift, for it led me here.
As important as it is to want to help your children, you must also have a support structure in place for yourself. At the end of the day, each human has the freedom and power to choose their path. All we can do is offer a way. It is attraction rather than promotion, so we must lead by demonstration. Making available a path to sobriety and a life of happy, joyous and free is what I do, first by living it. Whether or not one chooses that path is up to them.
I will tell you I have great faith in each Soul knowing exactly the right and most expedient path for their awakening. Yet, some must experience darkness before they can know themselves as the light. As CwG reminds us, our job is to be the light, to be the living demonstration of what is possible, and trust that, just as the ship lost in the storm finds its path back to port through the beacon of the forever shining lighthouse, so too will each Soul find its way home. Each Soul finds the right and perfect path, in the right and perfect time. Love and truth sets us free to be, do, and have whatever we choose as humans, but it doesn’t mean that we don’t benefit from the help of others. I was 23 when I got sober, and many earth angels have helped me along my path. I have been returning the favor ever since. I am here to help any way I can.
I see and feel your light, Susan. I am happy to join mine with yours to see if together we can’t help your children find another way. I would be happy to discuss your case with you, offer any suggestions, and look to see if any of our programs could help your situation.
Until then, I hold you and your family in my thoughts – JR
As I have stated in other columns, addiction is the number one killer in the US. Despite that statistics list heart disease, the larger question rarely addressed is, what actually causes heart disease? What is behind this completely preventable disease? Of course, the answer is addiction to substances that damage the heart. Heart disease and other related health issues that make the top 10 list never take into account the underlying preventable causes. This is where you will find addiction rearing its ugly head and why I say, without a shadow of doubt, that addiction IS the actual number one cause of death.
If you or someone you know is struggling with addiction, have them reach out. The Global Conversation offers an entire section dedicated to addiction and recovery, written by friend and colleague Kevin McCormack. Kevin and I regularly work together and have committed our life to recovery and the healing of addiction.
Soon the Conversations with God Foundation will be sponsoring retreats and webinars that will focus on recovery. You can learn more about that by signing up for their free newsletter here:
Conversations with God Foundation Newsletter
Until then, may you find the path to healing and health! – JR
(J.R. Westen, D.D. is a Holistic Health & Spiritual Counselor who has worked and presented side-by-side with Neale Donald Walsch for over a decade. He is passionate about helping individuals move beyond their emotional and spiritual challenges, transforming breakdowns into breakthroughs. His counseling and coaching provides practical wisdom and guidance that can be immediately incorporated to shift one’s experience of life.
As is true for most impactful teachers, J.R.’s own struggles and triumphs inspired him to find powerful ways of helping others. Sober since June 1, 1986, J.R.’s passion for helping individuals move through intense life challenges drove him to also specialize in Addiction and Grief Recovery.
J.R. currently shares his gift of counseling & coaching with individuals from around the world through the Wellness Center, Simply Vibrant, located on Long Island N.Y. In addition, he operates “Change House” a place where people come to transform. He also works with Escondido Sobering Services and now serves as the Director for the Conversations with God Foundation. He can be contacted at JR@CWG.ORG or JR@theglobalconversation.com, or to book an appointment, write support@simplyvibrant.com.)
For most of the addicted community, the disease has been brought on by the conscious decision to use substances that are likely to cause dependence. Typically, drug and alcohol use begins in response to trauma, peer pressure, stress, or overall lack of concern for the outcome. Nobody ever picked up a drink or a drug thinking that someday they may be so hopelessly addicted they would lie, cheat, steal, rape, assault, even murder under the influence. “It won’t happen to me” is the usual thinking.
It is my belief that the genetic aspect of addiction should be taught to everyone at an early age. This would enable everyone to fully understand the nature of their choice to drink or do drugs and what the consequences of that choice may render. I understand that testing would be too costly and not a very good use of anyone’s money. For most, simple observation of their family tree would let them know if they stand a good chance of being predisposed to the possibility of addiction.
But this article is going to target a different segment of the addicted population. There are many people who have unknowingly, unintentionally, even unwillingly become addicted to prescription drugs. This may have started from something as simple as a slip-and-fall injury, a car accident, or some other type of pain-causing trauma. Innocently enough, they went to their doctor and discussed the pain and what could be done about it. Most doctors (not all) are pretty quick to prescribe narcotic pain medication to their patients.
It has been my own personal experience that doctors freely prescribe dangerous narcotics for routine procedures and surgeries. I have personally been given a prescription for narcotics after having my wisdom teeth removed. It was my experience that a few Advil took care of any pain I had. Just recently I had hip surgery and was prescribed Oxycodone even though I told the doctor there was no chance I would ever take it. My experience post-surgery was that I did not even need an aspirin!
Here is something shocking, and I do hope there is a medical doctor reading this that is willing to vouch for the validity of what I am about to tell you. Most medical doctors only receive a few hours of training on addiction in their entire school career! I do wonder how things would change if they realized that the drugs they are prescribing could possible send their patients spiraling out of control?
The sad truth is that too many people believe that addiction is not a disease (doctors included) and that addiction is just a moral deficiency. Most people who do not have trouble controlling the prescriptions they take and the alcohol they drink are not willing to believe that other people cannot do the same. These so-called “normal people,” the ones who drink one beer and call it a night, or take one tablet of Vicodin every 4 – 6 hours as needed, they are the ones who can be most beneficial in assisting the addicted people into treatment. They are the ones with the clear mind to think with.
People under the influence of narcotics, suffering with addiction, do not have good judgment. Denial is a key indicator for addiction. Believe it or not, the addict has tricked themself into believing that they somehow need to double, triple, quadruple the dosage of the Vicodin because their pain is “worse” than most people’s, and seeing as their doctor “can’t see that,” they end up going to multiple doctors. Once all of the doctors figure out what they are doing and put an end to it, the addict “who knows better than the professional” seeks out the black market or a drug dealer for the drugs.
These people I am writing about here are doctors, lawyers, nurses, police, firemen, postal workers, moms and dads, grandmas and grandpas, sisters and brothers, priests and nuns, rabbis and Imams. Addiction crosses all lines and cultural boundaries. Those who know these people and see their behavior can do them the biggest favor ever and simply recognize it with them. These are typically family members that know what is going on yet are afraid to do anything about it.
Let me ask you this: If you won’t say something to the addicted, who will? Can you come from a deep place of love and compassion without judgment and condemnation? Can you set aside your own lack of understanding about the disease of addiction and just extend a hand to a drowning person?
For an addict to ask for help, many factors must fall into place, and none of them are pleasant. It is called “hitting the bottom” for a reason; those who reach out for help are at a place where they never thought they would go. Sometimes that window of opportunity is only open for a very short time. It generally takes deep legal troubles, relationship woes, financial ruin, homelessness, or a major health crisis related to usage for the addict to admit they have a problem.
Enabling by family members only ensures a much deeper and possibly tragic bottom for the addict.
The good news here is this: Those who become “accidentally addicted” have a much greater success rate in recovery than do the people who knowingly take illegal drugs for what some would call recreational usage.
The spiritual recovery program is perfectly suited for these people. They are usually not able to relate to the hardcore drug addicts found in the Twelve Step programs, although some do just fine there. What they need to do is to overhaul their own belief system and become aware of the power they hold over their own lives. Taking on an approach to life that embraces fellowship, personal integrity, and openness is a vital key to sustained sobriety as well as increasing the quality of life.
Most people will agree that relapse is less likely to occur in the life of a happy, outgoing person. For those seeking to improve their conscious contact with a Higher Power, happiness is a natural byproduct. Using a support group in the pursuit of spiritual living encourages a sense of belonging and family that all humans desire. Seeking support from coaches and counselors is also highly recommended in the early stages of recovery.
(Kevin McCormack is a Conversations with God Life Coach, a Spiritual helper on www.changingchange.net, and an Addictions recovery advisor. You can visit his website for more information at www.Kevin-Spiritualmentor.com To connect with Kevin, please email him at Kevin@theglobalconversation.com)
I am losing another friend to cancer…another dear friend and cancer is the culprit. I’m sick of it! I have stopped counting the losses, there have been so many, several just in this last year for me. I’m sick of it!! Yeah, I’m angry at you cancer, heart disease, diabetes, addiction…and I’m not gonna take it anymore! You have killed enough of my friends and I’m over it. If you are a friend of mine and you are behaving in a way that contributes to disease, I’m going to get in your face…that was fair warning. I am going to be that person who annoys the crap out of you, especially about those behaviors that do not serve you – you know, the ones that contribute to dis-ease rather than health.
YES, I’M TALKING TO YOU…
YOU, who are reading this right now, this is a message for you. Don’t stop reading, you know this was meant for you. I’m that uncomfortable feeling, here to once again get your attention, here to remind you to clean up your act. This is a personal message from me, and the universe, directly to you: Wake up to the lifestyle choices you are making that we both know contribute to things that shorten your life. Like Smoking. STOP IT. Just stop it. Don’t tell me, “I know, I know, I shouldn’t smoke,” and then go out and smoke another, NO. STOP IT RIGHT NOW.
I’m sick of it!!! We are all sick of it. I have watched too many people I love die of Cancer, COPD and other related illness because they wouldn’t go through the minor discomfort of quitting smoking. CANCER IS FAR MORE UNCOMFORTABLE! Trust me. I’ve seen it too many times. You don’t want to die that way, nor do you want to live with the treatment of it, either. YOU DON’T!
What’s behind it all…
As an addictionologist, I will tell you that addiction is the number one killer in America. Wait, isn’t heart disease the number one killer? According to the CDC it is. But what’s behind it? What causes heart disease? Addiction to the lifestyle choices that contribute to, or outright cause, heart disease. Addiction is the number one killer and heart disease is it’s first path of least resistance. Addiction in part is defined as: “continued use of any substance or behavior despite negative consequences”. The ultimate consequence being death.
BUT GOOD NEWS…
You can avoid that heart attack. Heart disease is completely preventable! You don’t catch it, you create it. If you can create it, you can prevent it. You can avoid future heart problems by adopting a healthy lifestyle right now! YES again, this means you! Don’t make me come over there!
Here are some heart disease prevention tips to get you started and to save you from my wrath.
Don’t smoke or use tobacco!
I think we covered that above, but it’s worth repeating. STOP IT!
Smoking or using tobacco is one of the most significant risk factors for developing heart disease and cancer there is. Chemicals in tobacco damage your heart and blood vessels, leading to narrowing of the arteries (atherosclerosis). Atherosclerosis leads to a heart attack. No amount of smoking is safe. And there is no safe exposure to secondhand smoke, either. Stop killing your friends and family too. STOP IT!
In addition, the nicotine in cigarette smoke makes your heart work harder by narrowing your blood vessels and increasing your heart rate and blood pressure. Carbon monoxide in cigarette smoke replaces some of the oxygen in your blood. This increases your blood pressure by forcing your heart to work harder to supply enough oxygen. Even “social smoking” while at a bar or restaurant is dangerous and increases the risk of heart disease and cancer. Addiction is far too often built into social norms, which is why we have come to accept heart disease and cancer as the top 2 killers in America. You don’t need a cig break, you need a break from cigarettes.
If you are smoking I am going to assume you are on fire and I will immediately put you out. I wonder how many buckets of ice cold water it would take to make you smoke free? Something to ponder…
The good news is that when you quit smoking, your risk of heart disease drops dramatically. And no matter how long or how much you smoked, you’ll start reaping rewards as soon as you quit. WHICH IS NOW!!!
Eat a Heart Healthy Diet of Plant Based Foods – the Health Benefits of Phytonutrients …
There are staggering mortality rates associated with serious health conditions such as heart disease, stroke, and cancer, the focus on prevention and nutrition has become more important than ever. All one has to do is read the last few months of my columns in the archive and follow the simple life changing advice to build a fortress of protection that dis-ease can’t penetrate.
Phytonutrients are the foot soldiers in that fight. Phytonutrients are the chemicals derived from plants and are very similar in composition to antioxidants. Phytonutrients come from plants that are suitable for human consumption. Though phytonutrients are not considered essential nutrients, science is discovering they provide health benefits that can help prevent the development of a myriad of conditions and diseases. Numerous studies have revealed that these plant chemicals actually protect tissues and cells from free radicals and their harmful effects. In essence, if you eat a variety of fresh vegetables and fruits, you will obtain the benefits of phytonutrients.
The best way to obtain the health benefits of phytonutrients is to go mostly raw, organic and colorful. That is, follow a diet that includes a significant amount of colorful fruits and vegetables. For example, Lycopene is a type of carotenoids that is prevalent in tomatoes, and is one such phytonutrient that has been recently been determined to produce health benefits. There is strong evidence that shows that it is beneficial for preventing the development of heart disease and other illnesses.
Other foods that contain significant levels of phytonutrients include garlic, beans, berries, and whole grains. A diet rich in fruits, vegetables, and whole grains can help protect your heart. Beans, other low-fat sources of protein can also reduce your risk of heart disease.
Limiting certain fats you eat is also important. Of the types of fat we consume — saturated, polyunsaturated, monounsaturated and trans fat — saturated fat and trans fat increase the risk of coronary artery disease by raising blood cholesterol levels. You will find these in foods that are fast, cheap and easy and come in a box…get out of that box! Just because they call it food doesn’t mean you should eat it. Look on the label for the term “partially hydrogenated” to avoid trans fat.
Omega-3 fatty acids, a type of polyunsaturated fat, decrease your risk of heart attack, and lower blood pressure. Some fish, such as salmon are a good natural source of omega-3s – (but watch out for GMO salmon, which come with their own risks). Omega-3s are present in smaller amounts in flaxseed oil, walnut oil, soybean oil and canola oil, and they can also be found in supplements. ( supplements I recommend are a good omega, vitamins B & D3 – the rest of what you need will come from a healthy diet)
Heart-healthy eating isn’t just about cutting back on the crap, though. Most people need to add more fruits and vegetables to their diet, with a goal of five to 10 servings a day – or better yet, just make it your every meal. And this doesn’t mean on the side, this means as your main course. Eating fruits and vegetables can not only help prevent heart disease, but also help prevent cancer and every other dis-ease.
Clearing up another myth…
Following a heart-healthy diet also means avoiding drinking alcohol…there is no RDA for alcohol consumption. Contrary to popular belief, there is no beneficial alcohol consumption….yes including wine. If you want the benefits of grapes, eat grapes. If you are going to drink, keep it to a minimum. AND if you are an addict, a minimum means NONE!
Exercise for at least 30 minutes a day…
Getting some regular, daily exercise can reduce your risk of heart disease big time. And when you combine physical activity with other lifestyle measures, such as creating and maintaining a healthy weight, the benefits are even greater. Physical activity helps you control your weight and can reduce your chances of developing other conditions that may put a strain on your heart, such as high blood pressure, high cholesterol and diabetes. It also reduces stress, which is known to be a factor in disease.
Try getting at least 30 to 60 minutes of moderately intense physical activity most days of the week. And remember that other activities such as gardening, housekeeping, taking the stairs and walking the dog, all count. You don’t have to exercise strenuously to achieve benefits, but you can see bigger benefits by increasing the intensity, duration and frequency of your workouts. Yoga is one of my favorites.
The importance of maintaining a healthy weight…
As you put on weight in adulthood, your weight gain is mostly fat, rather than muscle. This excess weight can lead to conditions that increase your chances of heart disease — high blood pressure, high cholesterol and diabetes. Even a small weight loss can be beneficial. Reducing your weight by just 10 percent can decrease your blood pressure, lower your blood cholesterol level and reduce your risk of diabetes, which is also on the top ten list of the things that kill.
One of my favorite reads last year was Eat to Live by Dr. Joel Furhman. Within his book is a comprehensive look at the benefits of eating a plant-based diet. He also dispels the myth of other popular diets that don’t work. Far too often MD’s know little about nutrition. Not true for Dr. Furhman.
Well, there you have it. I guess I have ranted enough for a New Year. I am just so sick and tired of losing people I love to avoidable health issues. You know who you are. You know this was a message directly for you. Get off your butt and get moving toward a healthier life right now. Like any bad habit, 3 weeks from now you will have begun to rewire your brain to a new healthier habit. 3 weeks, folks! And after 90 days you own it! Three months to a new you…
Need help? That is why I am here. I help people create successful transformation in their lives by overcoming what seems insurmountable; you won’t overcome it on the couch. Get off your butt and get going. Reach out, you can speak to me for nothing and see if having a coach in your corner wouldn’t change everything.
YOU CAN DO IT…Don’t make me come over there!
You can. It was love that made me do it. It is love that drives my passion for health and wellness. It is love that will heal you. The love of yourself enough to make choices and decisions that not only benefit you, but everyone around you. Love is always the answer. – With love, JR
(J.R. Westen, D.D. is a Holistic Health & Spiritual Counselor who has worked and presented side-by-side with Neale Donald Walsch for over a decade. He is passionate about helping individuals move beyond their emotional and spiritual challenges, transforming breakdowns into breakthroughs. His coaching provides practical wisdom and guidance that can be immediately incorporated to shift one’s experience of life. As is true for most impactful teachers, J.R.’s own struggles and triumphs inspired him to find powerful ways of helping others. Sober since June 1, 1986, J.R.’s passion for helping individuals move through intense life challenges drove him to also specialize in Addiction and Grief Recovery. J.R. currently shares his gift of counseling & coaching with individuals from around the world through the Wellness Center, Simply Vibrant, located on Long Island N.Y. In addition, he operates “Change House” a place where people come to transform, he also works with Escondido Sobering Services and serves on the Board of Directors for the Conversations with God Foundation. He can be contacted at JR@theglobalconversation.com, or to book an appointment, write support@simplyvibrant.com.)
(This article was contributed by Guest Author Herby Bell, DC)
After watching the militant Muslim reaction around the world — the purely insane response to a substandard film created by another fanatic about God knows what — I got to thinking about a startling analogy.
I’m in the healthcare business. My biggest competitor is the sick care business, and here’s how it works (and stay with me–I’ll connect the dots):
We have an innate genetic intelligence that responds in a healthy way to whatever is in the environment. Our environment has become increasingly deficient and toxic in terms of the water we drink to the air we breathe, along with countless other modern living stressors. Accordingly, our body’s healthy, genetic response is to place us in a state of “fight or flight” in order to survive.
The problem arises when this fight-or-flight state of being becomes the rule, rather than the exception, due to the ever-present and increasing environmental stressors. Dis-ease and ultimately disease ensue. Maybe you’ve heard mention lately of addiction, diabetes, heart disease, cancer, osteoporosis, fibromyalgia, depression, fatigue, decreased sex drive, anxiety, obesity, indigestion, lack of sleep…etc., etc.
All of us are in some state of fight or flight, more often than not, when living in this culture–in this world. Instead of decreasing the stress and improving adaptability by being taught to eat well, move well, and think well — the health care business — we are carpet bombed by literally dozens of sound bytes and video images per day about “taking” something to “kill” the pain or to trick our bodies out of their pristine, invariably reliable intelligence — the sick care business.
Recently I gave lectures about this well-documented stress response to a local high school human biology department. I asked the students to close their eyes as I played the audio only, including the side effects disclaimer of one of the drug commercials we hear on television, day in and day out. The students reported that they did not even listen to or hear the words anymore, that it had become just background noise. The pretty images on television stick and the devastating side effects get reduced to white noise. Good news for the sick care business, a subliminal auto suggestion marketing vehicle that pays off handsomely. Repetition is the mother of all invention…
All right, now back to the militant Muslims. If the human ecosystem is barraged with stress and its correct and healthy response is to develop chronic lifestyle diseases, doesn’t it stand to reason that the collective ecosystems or the culture –any culture — is susceptible to the same reaction after being inundated with sick propaganda–here, there, everywhere!–and certain factions of that culture, like a neoplastic growth in cancer, will react in that deadly, perhaps unpredictable, but inevitable way? It’s happening.
We have to stop kidding ourselves. The world is in a chronic state of fight or flight. THE SICK CARE INDUSTRY IS NOT HELPING. Let’s teach our kids to eat well, to move well, and to think well and decrease our stress while bolstering our immune systems instead of waiting for some magic pill or potion to come along to save us.
Let’s be honest that the preventable, man-made atrocities and insanity all around the world are directly related to how well a culture’s individuals are caring for themselves, how well they are eating, moving, and thinking.
Let’s get out of the sick care business and into the health care business. The well-being of the world may just depend upon it. Let’s move from fight or flight to love and light.
(Dr. Herby Bell is owner and director of Recovery Health Care, an integrated approach to addiction treatment in Redwood City, California. For more information please call 650 474 2121 or email: herbybell@me.com.)
Okay, we have all heard someone say that, whether it was in jest or someone actually meant “I am going to drink because I can‘t deal with you.” Oftentimes the loved ones of an addict will actually believe that they are causing the addict to use, and they may just be right.
By no means am I saying that the user would not be using if those around them simply conformed to their wishes. What I am saying is that the person who is in early stages of recovery has an enormous amount of guilt and shame to work through in order to maintain sobriety. The distractions of an unhealthy relationship can be the stumbling block the person in early recovery cannot hurdle.
The co-dependent has become so reactionary that they lose themselves totally in the others problem. They either obsess over how to gain or maintain sobriety for the abuser, or they demand reparations for all the past damage before the significant other is ready or able to give it. This is why it is so vital for the co-dependent to accept that they have been affected by the disease and face the dysfunction it has create in their own life. As we fall together, so too shall we grow together.
There are three possible outcomes for a recovering alcoholic or drug addicts and their families:
1. The spouse or family finds a program and recovers and the user recovers.
2. The spouse or family does not recover and the user relapses.
3. The spouse or family does not recover and the user leaves the family to stay in recovery.
I understand how hard it is for someone who has lived with a person in active addiction to accept that they have contracted the same disease. I know in the minds of many this sounds like an indictment on the “victim.” I assure you that it is not an attack. Your wounds are real, your anger is valid, and your inability to trust is understandable. What I am trying to convey here is that you have put life on hold while you did the best you could to try and get a handle on a seemingly impossible situation. In order for you to regain your sense of normalcy, you must engage yourself in the process of re-discovery of self.
We are in relationships to experience our highest thoughts about who we are and why we are here. In a functionally loving relationship, we work together for the highest good. My best asset to another is my own understanding of my purpose in life. When I take care of me, I am taking care of “we.” This is precisely what the 12-step programs are geared towards, redefining me in a healthy and positive way.
It is particularly important to define personal boundaries in a working relationship between a co-dependent and a person in recovery. In all relationships one must let their counterpart know what is acceptable and what is not. Most often we do not know what our boundaries are until they are crossed. Once we are aware of an issue, we must then find the most effective way to inform the other of our discovery.
Communication is something that in most cases had broken down many years prior to the point of both parties getting into recovery, yet it is essential to work towards finding a compassionate and understanding way of communication as soon as possible. Many times we don’t share our thoughts and feelings due to our own made-up story of possible outcomes of doing so. This is can no longer be acceptable in recovery. There is no room for sweeping our problems under the rug and acting like everything is fine. We must create a space that is safe for our self and our other to express themselves.
My suggestion to anyone who finds themselves affected by a significant other’s abuse would be to find an appropriate 12-step meeting, such as Al-Anon, or Alateen, CODA, Nar-Anon, etc. Determine what it is you would like to do moving forward and take steps towards doing that. Define what you will not accept and communicate that to the addict in your life.
(Kevin McCormack is a “Conversations with God” Life Coach, a Spiritual Helper on www.changingchange.net, and an addictions recovery advisor. To connect with Kevin, please email him at Kevin@theglobalconversation.com.)
With Colorado’s voters passing the historic Amendment 64, is this further proof that the country is going down the drain? Or have we just begun to realize that our power lies within the freedom to make our own choices?
Marijuana has long been considered the gateway drug, meaning that it leads to harder drugs and a life of crime and dereliction. This point has been argued by many, with little progress in proving or disproving its validity. I could, from my own experience, argue it either way. What I have realized on my own spiritual journey of recovery is that all choices lead us to a higher place, eventually.
The legalization of pot for adults over the age of 21 is vital to point out here. My first experience with pot was when I was 12 years old. I believe that for most people with addictive personalities the first experience with pot comes well before they are of legal age. What is not common knowledge is that an addictive personality exists long before the drug ever is introduced. The disease of addiction is a genetic condition passed down from generation to generation. I do not use the term “genetic defect” as some would because I do not believe it is a defect. In my case, it has been my greatest asset. God would not create a being with a defect, nor would the soul make a mistake.
Do I believe that the smoking of pot unleashed my craving to be high? No, I do not. My first drug was attention, the getting of people’s attention any way I could. I had the strongest desire to be the center of attention in my family from my earliest recollection, and if I didn’t succeed in doing so, I would quickly try another method of achieving my goal. Failing to achieve the attention only gave my addictive personality reason to act out, seeking louder and more brazen behaviors. By the time my first drug (cigarettes) entered the picture, I was merely nine years old. I first began using them to seek the approval of my peers, while at the same time unconsciously still looking to be noticed by my family. Negative attention is better than no attention in the mind of a person with addictive traits.
What happens now in these states that have decided to legalize marijuana? Do we care if someone drives high? How do we administer drug tests when accidents have occurred? Is there going to be a legal limit? What about contact highs? Although I do not fear the occasional smell of pot sending me spiraling back into the darkness of active addiction, it certainly wouldn’t be advised that any recovering addict be exposed high concentrations of secondhand pot smoke. It took going to one indoor concert to realize that was no place for me to be.
What about employers? Will they be cited for discrimination by not hiring someone or firing someone who openly smokes pot? How will society deal with the open use of marijuana? Imagine yourself sitting at the beach with your family and all of the sudden you are surrounded by a group of people who choose to get high. Do we want that as a society?
The list of issues that will need to be addressed will keep the lawmakers busy for quite some time. The personal effect cannot be determined until some time has passed to see what other consequences may pop up.
I do believe that pot use is less harmful than alcohol, and statistics certainly back that up. It is almost unconscionable that society makes legal alcohol consumption. The damage that alcohol costs society is mind-boggling and the personal destruction that can occur in families from drinking is beyond pandemic. Yet the past tells us that it is easier to accept the consequences rather than stand for what is in our best interest. Yes, denial is alive and well in the human species.
So let’s hear what you think about this. Take this time to be open about your thoughts and feelings regarding the legalization of drugs. Should they all be legal? Do we allow people to make choices that we see as unhealthy and let them learn from their mistakes? Does legislation make a difference?
Conversations with God states, “Obedience is not creation, and thus can never produce salvation.” It would seem obvious to me that this statement is proven to be true over and over throughout the course of history. What say you?
(Kevin McCormack is a “Conversations with God” Life Coach, a Spiritual Helper on www.changingchange.net, and an Addictions Recovery Advisor. To connect with Kevin, please email him at Kevin@theglobalconversation.com)
Located in the area of the brain commonly know as the “mid brain” swirls the thoughts of survival. Have you ever put your hand on a hot stove or pot? Did you think to yourself, “Gee, this is hot, I should pull my hand away before I get burned”? Of course you didn’t. Your hand was flying back and away from that pot before you were even aware it was hot. This is your mid brain functioning to keep you safe, providing for your survival.
In the mind of the person with a spiritual deficiency disorder, also know as addiction, the act of taking a drink or a drug or placing a bet or having risky sex or exerting power over another human being is happening before the person can rationalize that what they are doing is harmful. This is how a perversion of the mid brain function takes over a person’s life.
Here is the hope for those afflicted: There is always a pause. There is always an opening for recovery to happen. The alcoholic eventually sleeps after a long night drinking; the sex addict feels deep shame after their binge, and when he awakens, he is momentarily able to consider the magnitude of his powerlessness. Many will cry out, “I will never do that again,” only to find themselves right back in the same pattern only hours later.
Without a spiritual connection, a healthy coping response is virtually impossible. The addict has no power over what is taking place in the mid brain when the reward chemicals are flowing. The possibility for change without outside intervention is minuscule. For recovery to take place, something or someone must take advantage of the “window of opportunity” as it opens. Being aware and present for that brief moment is a difficult task, and the closest friends or family members are rarely capable of providing the help needed.
I have had the experience of the “window or opportunity” opening and feel very fortunate to have had support in getting the help I needed. I look back now and see how it was truly a Divine intervention that had occurred. All of the exact right things lined up at exactly the right time, and I said exactly the right words to the right person: “Dad, I am ready for help.” Three hours later, I was in a detox ward at a local hospital.
Most would say we have no control over the autonomic system and would use the argument that you can not consciously stop yourself from breathing. This would indicate that we have no power over our survival mechanism. Is it true, however, that we actually can stop ourselves from breathing by other means — for example, strangulation. In this example, we used a deductive reasoning to work around a built-in safeguard, effectively achieving the same outcome: our death.
There is much we do not know about the brain and what it is up to most of the time. Some have said that we only use 10% of our brains at any given time. So the possibility exists that somewhere in the brain there is a connection to the divine, a WiFi, if you will. It has been written in many religious and spiritual books “Through Him all things are possible.” I take this to mean that nothing is out of our reach, and nobody is beyond help.
The right brain is known as the intuitive, holistic, spiritual side of the brain. The left side is the logical, rational, thinking side of the brain. There is a super highway, so to speak, that connects these two sides, and it is called the corpus callosum. It is my theory that this highway could be the highway to heaven and that our greatest mystery is happening along that stretch of road. When we ask for help sincerely, powerfully, passionately, the Spirit crosses over from the right side of the brain to the left and infuses our decision-making with healthy, positive, and Holy energy.
This may be an oversimplification of our brain functioning, and I am sure there are many scientists that would rebuke my analogy. The statement I find true is, “No prayer goes unanswered.” We may not listen, we may not always hear, but the fact remains that the request has been answered. It is entirely up to us to listen and acknowledge the presence of God in our lives.
(Kevin McCormack is a “Conversations with God” Life Coach, a Spiritual Helper on www.changingchange.net, and an Addictions Recovery Advisor. To connect with Kevin, please email him at Kevin@theglobalconversation.com)
You can tell if you are addicted to a behavior or an outcome when the absence of it causes you to abandon your happiness. This is the definition of addiction from the book “When Everything Changes, Change Everything. ” The word “abandon” indicates that we are aware on some level that we have placed our happiness on something external to ourselves. This definition becomes evident when we consider a popular television show in the United States called “Hoarding, Buried Alive.”
If you have not seen this show or even heard of this thing called hoarding, it is quite shocking to see what types of distorted reality some people are operating out of. In one of the most disturbing hoarding cases, a man had gone to his mother’s house because she hadn’t been seen in a few weeks. He couldn’t get into the house and then he noticed a strong smell coming from what seemed like the basement. “I thought, there’s no happy ending here,” he said. “I just had a feeling. I had a bad feeling for years…It’s a terrible thing to deal with.” Three days later, the police found his mother’s body under a pile of trash.
Watching the people on this show, as well as knowing some personally, the hoarder is so attached to the items they possess that those items end up possessing them! The idea that happiness comes from within has been so deeply forgotten that they desperately search for the thing that will bring them happiness, only to become buried under the weight of attachments. So where does it start? How does one get so distorted that they have become accustomed to living in squalor, with dead animals, feces, and mountains of garbage, clothes, and material possessions in some cases from floor to ceiling in their dwellings?
One theory is that a trauma has occurred in the affected person’s life that has created the belief that their life depends on these items being in their possession. The trauma was such that denial of their true nature was too painful for their ego to handle. Childhood traumas can be neglect, they can be physical abuse, including sexual abuse, or they can simply be from growing up in a house where emotions are not shown. These are just a few of the abuses many in society heap upon children. These traumas will manifest themselves differently in adults, and even more so if the individual does not have a strong sense of resiliency.
From the outside looking in, the obsession with materialistic possessions confounds most people because they look solely at the despicable conditions and wonder how anyone can tolerate that. What is clear from the addictions and compulsions specialist’s point of view is that through a predictable path of events in the hoarder’s life, they suffer from a disease, and a lack of ease is exactly what it is. They cannot easily ascertain their own ability to survive and find pleasure outside of the parameters they have set for themselves; that is, they feel they must keep on collecting items and never give them up. To give them up, they perceive they would be letting go of their comfort, happiness, and even possibly their survival.
Can this type of behavior be changed? Is there a chance for a recovery for the hoarder? Of course there is a chance; it is rare, however, due to the reclusive nature of the disorder. The statement “With him, all things are possible” comes to mind here. The more difficult question is, however, how does the afflicted get to the space where they can even entertain seeking a spiritual resolution to their disease?
How can we as a loving, caring community support these people and help them to find themselves once again and lead a productive, happy life?
(Kevin McCormack is a Conversations with God Life Coach, a Spiritual helper on www.changingchange.net, Addictions recovery advisor. To connect with Kevin please email him at Kevin@theglobalconversation.com)
The accepted definition of “addiction” in the medical community is “continued use in spite of negative consequences.”
Now combine that with Conversations with God’s definition: We experience addiction when the absence of something in our life renders us unable to experience joy and happiness.
Let’s look at humanity’s addiction to our story.
What is “story”? Story is a tool the ego uses to protect the small us, the physical sense of who we are. An observation of mine is that most beings are living in a distorted reality as a result of our ego protecting what it has made up about what it imagines we are lacking. We then take that out into the world, either silently or quite loudly. Some of us sneak through life quietly, hoping to not be noticed due to our story that we are simply not good enough; others have to be the center of attention, the loudest person in the room, for fear that they, too, will be seen as insufficient. We all know the person who is always ready to knock someone else down in order to prop themselves up.
We have all heard someone tell stories like, “I would have gotten the promotion, but my boss doesn’t like people who are taller than him” or “Jane broke up with me because she didn’t like how I say what is on my mind” or “The cops had it in for me because I have tattoos.”
Is that person really higher up or more evolved than the rest of us, therefore deserving of their self-created pedestal? Is anyone greater or less than another? Are we addicted to our separation? Are our hang-ups holding us back from experiencing life in all its grandness?
Why is it that many of us tend to hide behind a story? A reason for why we act the way we act? Are we really just acting out our lives here in this grand illusion to protect ourselves from some unforeseen danger?
What makes some people rise above their story? What is your story and when will you change it or, at the very least, challenge it? What would it look like if you did this? What would the world look like if we all managed to get out from under our self- imposed prisons?
By now almost everyone has heard the saying “The truth will set you free,” yet not too many people are willing to tell the truth even to themselves. Does the truth hurt or does it truly open us to more freedom and joy?
(Kevin McCormack may be reached at Kevin@TheGlobalConversation.com)
