Conversations with God
I don’t mind if you post this, but I’d like to remain anonymous. First, I don’t have any proof that my co-worker friend is stealing from our workplace. Having said that, I’m nearly certain that she is because suddenly she is spending a great deal of money. Until recently she has been struggling financially in a big way. Should I say something to her or just mind my own business? I really care for her and don’t want to see her get in trouble. I keep going back and forth on what I should or should not do. I’ve asked myself a hundred times, “What would Oneness do?”
Dear Anonymous… I can certainly see your predicament and understand your confusion as to what to do. Because you don’t really know whether she’s stealing or not, you don’t have enough information to know how to respond.
You ask, “What would Oneness do,” and in times like these, I find it best to go to my Higher Wisdom and ask. Your key word here is “Oneness”. Since we are all part of the One Universal Energy, we have access to all of Its information. It knows so much more than the limited information our minds hold, and if you had all of the information at your fingertips you would know exactly what to do.
So the question becomes, “How can I access the information I need,” and the answer is, through your soul. Your soul is the part of you that is always connected to the One. The way to do this is to get very quiet and still, center yourself, then ask, “Dear God, what is the highest and best for me to do regarding my friend? Should I say anything to her about my suspicion that she is stealing, and if so, what is the highest and best thing for me to say?” Have a notepad handy, ready to write down anything that comes through. Don’t censor it. Just allow yourself to write whatever comes into your mind.
Now, I’m sorry if this sounds like a cop-out from me, but this is honestly the highest and best advice I know of to give you. It is exactly what I would do if I were in the same situation. When I open myself to hearing what God shares with me, the information I receive always makes me feel so much better, and the advice never steers me wrong. When we know how to access the Higher Wisdom of The One, we never again have to wallow in confusion about anything.
If you need help quieting your mind in order to do this, please click on the link below and follow the process called “How To Have Your Own Conversation With God”:
http://haveyourowncwg.kajabi.com/fe/46415-have-your-own-conversation-with-god
If, after accessing your Higher Wisdom you feel guided to speak with your friend, I can offer three suggestions to help it go as smoothly as possible:
1. Come from Big Love during the conversation. Be determined to stay as loving as possible, no matter what happens.
2. Be impeccable with your word. Choose your language slowly and carefully, allowing the One to speak through you, as you.
3. Think from the end. Envision how you would like for each of you to feel after the conversation is over. This goes a long way toward creating the scenario the way you want.
(Annie Sims is the Global Director of CWG Advanced Programs, is a Conversations With God Life Coach and author/instructor of the CWG Online School. To connect with Annie, please email her at Annie@TheGlobalConversation.com.
(If you would like a question considered for publication, please submit your request to: Advice@TheGlobalConversation.com where our team is waiting to hear from you.)
An additional resource: The CWG Helping Outreach offers spiritual assistance from a team of non-professional/volunteer Spiritual Helpers responding to every post from readers within 24 hours or less. Nothing on the CCN site should be construed or is intended to take the place of or be in any way similar to professional therapeutic or counseling services. The site functions with the gracious willing assistance of lay persons without credentials or experience in the helping professions. What these volunteers possess is an awareness of the theology of Conversations with God. It is from this context that they offer insight, suggestions, and spiritual support during moments of unbidden, unexpected, or unwelcome change on the journey of life.
My friend Kimberly gets all the guys and all the money while I’m always struggling to pay the bills and never meet any men I like. It’s not fair. I don’t get it! She always seems to find the best-looking, nicest guys, and if it doesn’t work out, she meets another one in no time. And she doesn’t have to work because she always gets plenty of money from her ex-husband, while I’m always slaving away, trying to make ends meet. I love her a lot but can’t help feeling jealous and it’s starting to affect our relationship. … Lori
Dear Lori… I can certainly understand why you are feeling frustrated in this relationship, but the good news is, I have a key that can unlock a whole new way of looking at this AND help you start to have similar experiences to hers.
You say you are feeling jealousy, so I invite you to work toward changing that feeling to envy. Here’s why: Jealousy is detrimental to our well-being, while envy is healthy and inspiring. Envy is one of the Five Natural Emotions. It’s what makes you want to do what someone else is doing, knowing that you CAN. It’s what makes you get back on the bike after you fall off, because others have demonstrated that they can stay on it! If we become resentful that they can stay on the bike when we can’t, that’s when we become jealous. Envy continually repressed becomes jealousy, a very unnatural emotion. If you continue to feel jealous and resentful of Kimberly, it may, indeed, undermine your relationship.
The key is simple: Change your thought from “It’s not fair that she gets all the guys and money she wants” to, “If she can do it, I can too!” Allow her experience of life to inspire you instead of depress you. Let it serve as a springboard for creating similar experiences in your own life, because the truth is, there is nothing you cannot have as long as you realize it. And if she really is the friend you say she is, I’m sure she will be happy to tell you how she does it! Even if she doesn’t fully understand the metaphysical reasons behind her money and men friend manifestations, I would bet that something she says when relating her experiences to you will light a spark of understanding that will help you not only no longer feel jealous, but will give you ideas about how you, too, can have all the men and money you want for yourself.
(Annie Sims is the Global Director of CWG Advanced Programs, is a Conversations With God Coach and author/instructor of the CWG Online School. To connect with Annie, please email her at Annie@TheGlobalConversation.com.
(If you would like a question considered for publication, please submit your request to: Advice@TheGlobalConversation.com where our team is waiting to hear from you.)
An additional resource: The CWG Helping Outreach offers spiritual assistance from a team of non-professional/volunteer Spiritual Helpers responding to every post from readers within 24 hours or less. Nothing on the CCN site should be construed or is intended to take the place of or be in any way similar to professional therapeutic or counseling services. The site functions with the gracious willing assistance of lay persons without credentials or experience in the helping professions. What these volunteers possess is an awareness of the theology of Conversations with God. It is from this context that they offer insight, suggestions, and spiritual support during moments of unbidden, unexpected, or unwelcome change on the journey of life.
How can I lovingly respond to friends who tell me that the only way to access God is through Jesus Christ and that I will be condemned if I don’t accept him as my Lord and Savior? I love Conversations With God and still attend a Christian church, but I am beginning to feel alienated there. Please help!… Patt
Dear Patt… My father, who believes as your Christian friends do, once told me he was worried about my Soul. I told him as earnestly as I could that God and I have a wonderful, loving, close personal relationship and he need worry no more! I think it helped ease his mind.
Living in Nashville, the city some refer to as the Buckle of the Bible Belt, I sometimes find myself in conversations about my CWG work with fundamentalist Christians. When this happens I make an effort to relate to them in terminology that they can understand. I look for common ground in these discussions because the foundational principles of Jesus’ teaching and Conversations With God are not so very different, although CWG offers us a much larger view of Life and how it works. Knowing that each of these discussions is an opportunity to gently introduce people to CWG and to help expand their spiritual awareness, I try my best to be impeccable with my word and as loving as possible.
Since you are being proselytized to, Patt, you may want to suggest setting judgment aside and listening with an open mind when discussing each other’s beliefs. Then speak your truth, but soothe your words with peace and loving kindness. Don’t be surprised, though, if, as time goes on, you feel yourself being pulled more toward other people who share your beliefs. You may even find that a different church or spiritual center more deeply resonates with you, and please don’t feel guilty about it if this happens. You may make wonderful new friends who will support you on your life’s journey and in your spiritual growth.
(Annie Sims is the Global Director of CWG Advanced Programs, is a Conversations With God Coach and author/instructor of the CWG Online School. To connect with Annie, please email her at Annie@TheGlobalConversation.com
(If you would like a question considered for publication, please submit your request to: Advice@TheGlobalConversation.com where our team is waiting to hear from you.)
An additional resource: The CWG Helping Outreach offers spiritual assistance from a team of non-professional/volunteer Spiritual Helpers responding to every post from readers within 24 hours or less. Nothing on the CCN site should be construed or is intended to take the place of or be in any way similar to professional therapeutic or counseling services. The site functions with the gracious willing assistance of lay persons without credentials or experience in the helping professions. What these volunteers possess is an awareness of the theology of Conversations with God. It is from this context that they offer insight, suggestions, and spiritual support during moments of unbidden, unexpected, or unwelcome change on the journey of life.
‘Tis the season to observe and hear the familiar sights and sounds of the Salvation Army red kettles, accompanied by the bell-toting, red-apron-wearing volunteers who faithfully stand in front of the big stores and busy street corners in hopes of being the recipient of your spare change. In response to some establishments banning the sounds of the bells and requiring the infamous holiday bell-ringers to wave at passersby in silence, my first thought was how much I had grown accustomed to and actually enjoyed the sound of those bells as a symbol of the beginning of the Christmas season, almost as much as my first delicious cup of eggnog each year.
But there is a larger and darker underlying story here in relation to the Salvation Army bell-ringers, one that might make you think twice about tossing a coin or two into those famous red kettles.
The Salvation Army has been facing a growing backlash over the past several years because people are discovering that their organization is an evangelical Christian church which actively advocates against the civil rights of gays and lesbians around the world, in addition to discriminating against gays in employment.
The website NoRedKettles.com has created a historical timeline which demonstrates the religious-backed organization’s anti-gay history:
“In recent years, the Salvation Army has come under fire for its lengthy history of anti-LGBT political maneuvering and other incidents. The church has publicly articulated its belief that homosexuality is unacceptable, stating:
‘Scripture opposes homosexual practices by direct comment and also by clearly implied disapproval. The Bible treats such practices as self-evidently abnormal. … Attempts to establish or promote such relationships as viable alternatives to heterosexually-based family life do not conform to God’s will for society.’
While such statements were recently removed from the Salvation Army’s website, the church has yet to repudiate any of its explicitly anti-gay beliefs. And though these positions may seem to be limited to the group’s internal doctrines, they’ve become a persistent element of the church’s overtly political activities – activities which have negatively impacted the Salvation Army’s ability to provide charitable services, and have aimed to limit the rights and benefits of LGBT citizens in multiple nations.
1986 – The Salvation Army of New Zealand collected signatures against the Homosexual Law Reform Act, which repealed the law criminalizing sex between adult men. The Salvation Army later apologized for campaigning against the Act.
1998 – The Salvation Army of the United States chose to turn down $3.5 million in contracts with the city of San Francisco, resulting in the closure of programs for the homeless and senior citizens. The church backed out of these contracts due to San Francisco’s requirement that city contractors must provide spousal benefits to both same-sex partners and opposite-sex partners of employees. Lieutenant Colonel Richard Love stated:
‘We simply cannot agree to be in compliance of the ordinance.’
In 2004, the Salvation Army in New York City also threatened to close down all of its services for the city’s homeless due to a similar non-discrimination ordinance.
2000 – The Salvation Army of Scotland submitted a letter to Parliament opposing the repeal of Section 28, a law prohibiting ‘the teaching in any maintained school of the acceptability of homosexuality as a pretended family relationship.’ Colonel John Flett, the church’s Scotland Secretary, wrote:
‘We can easily envisage a situation where, due to active promotion of homosexuality in schools, children will grow up feeling alienated if they fail to conform.’
The Salvation Army of Scotland has never retracted or apologized for its suggestion that homosexuality would be promoted in schools or that children would be encouraged to become gay.
2001 – The Salvation Army of the United States attempted to make a deal with the Bush administration ensuring that religious charities receiving federal funding would be exempt from any local ordinances banning anti-gay discrimination. Church spokesman David A. Fuscus explained that the group did not want to extend medical benefits to same-sex partners of its employees. The deal fell through after it was publicized by the Washington Post.
2012 – The Salvation Army of Burlington, Vermont fired case worker Danielle Morantez immediately after discovering she was bisexual. The church’s employee handbook reads, in part, ‘The Salvation Army does reserve the right to make employment decisions on the basis of an employee’s conduct or behavior that is incompatible with the principles of The Salvation Army.’
Later that year, Salvation Army spokesperson Major George Hood reaffirmed the church’s anti-gay beliefs, saying:
‘A relationship between same-sex individuals is a personal choice that people have the right to make. But from a church viewpoint, we see that going against the will of God.’
2013 – The Salvation Army continues to remove links from its website to religious ministries providing so-called ‘ex-gay’ conversion therapy, such as Harvest USA and Pure Life Ministries. These links were previously provided as resources under the Salvation Army’s section on dealing with ‘sexual addictions’.”
I wonder how many people actually know any of this? I wonder how many people, even if they did know any of this, would care?
Do you?
Does the fact that the underlying belief system for this organization is one that breathes discrimination into our world change whether or not you toss money into that red bucket? It is undeniable that the Salvation Army aides thousands of people every day with food and shelter and other types of charitable assistance. I remember as a child, when a devastating tornado tore through our small neighborhood, The Salvation Army was quick to serve food so graciously to all those affected. All things considered, perhaps that high level of compassion and humanitarian assistance becomes the most important piece of the equation here. Or does it?
In a world where many feel powerless when it comes to implementing the types of social changes we desire to see, isn’t one of the most effective ways to create change realized in the way in which we choose to spend our money? I am fairly confident that a large percentage of people have no idea who or what they are supporting with their dollars…nor do they think ever about it.
Conversations with God says “Every act is an act of self-definition.”
Who are you defining yourself as when you give your money to an organization which espouses intolerance? Who are you defining yourself as when you have no idea where your money is going and what it is supporting, but continue to do it anyway? Who are you defining yourself as when you make conscious choices to share your money with organizations which are in alignment with who you really are?
According to NoRedKettles.com:
“The Salvation Army claims to offer its services ‘without discrimination.’ NoRedKettles.com therefore invites the Salvation Army to live up to its claims of non-discrimination by affirming the following:
- That the organization will no longer withdraw its charitable services from municipalities in order to avoid complying with non-discrimination laws.
- That the organization’s lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender employees, as well as their partners, will no longer face discrimination or unequal treatment in hiring, promotion, or the provisioning of employment benefits.
- That the organization will cease any and all political activities against fully equal rights and benefits for LGBT citizens of any nation.
These actions represent meaningful, concrete steps that the Salvation Army can take to show the world that it is genuinely and unreservedly committed to the cause of non-discrimination and equality for the LGBT community. Countless major charities worldwide are capable of effectively carrying out their charitable functions on a large scale without anti-LGBT political activities or anti-LGBT employment policies. NoRedKettles.com believes the Salvation Army is capable of doing the same.
We recognize that the Salvation Army is capable of extraordinary goodness. This year, we’re optimistic that the Salvation Army will choose to truly ‘do the most good’ by opening their hearts to treat everyone with equal love, dignity, and respect.”
If you are reading these words, the time has come for you, too, to make a choice. Of course, no choice being right and no choice being wrong, but all choices, rather, being a declaration of your own truth and an expression of who you know yourself to be.
So the next time you find yourself faced with a bell-toting, red-apron-wearing volunteer waving a bell in front of a red kettle, hoping silently for your contribution, what will you choose?
(Lisa McCormack is a Feature Editor at The Global Conversation. She is also a member of the Spiritual Helper team at www.ChangingChange.net, a website offering emotional and spiritual support. To connect with Lisa, please e-mail her at Lisa@TheGlobalConversation.com.)
At your suggestion I have started doing Neale’s “How To Have Your Own Conversation With God” process on CWG TV. Today was my third CWG and it continues to be of tremendous help. I am still working on going deeper, but even now it is so good to go there, if that makes sense.
When I first went to CWG TV the other day, I watched Neale’s introductory video, where he talks about re-contextualization. I immediately put it to use in regard to my ex-husband because I have continued to go on believing that somehow I just didn’t measure up to him, that I was somehow an inferior person and he wanted to move on to someone better than me. I have been divorced for over a decade, so this is kind of embarrassing to admit, but it’s true.
Well, the truth is I don’t know that for sure… and well, I guess you could say I just made it up and chose to keep believing it. So, like Neale said, why not make up something better, more to your liking. So I did. And I am sticking to it and feel so much better and am leaving that old “reality” behind. Do you have any insights or suggestions you can add to this? Thank you… Lee
Dear Lee,
You hit the nail on the proverbial head when you said you “chose to keep believing it.” A belief is only a thought that we’ve continued to think over and over, and the great thing about this is, we are always at choice as to what we will think about now! Yes, if this has been weighing on you for over a decade, it is high time for a New Thought. Change your thinking, change your life.
While you are re-contextualizing this event, I invite you to remember that Conversations With God says, “I have sent you nothing but angels.” The relationship with your ex-husband wouldn’t have existed were it not for your ultimate expansion and highest good.
My prayer regarding difficult situations is this: “Thank you, God, for helping me to see this through the lens of my soul, rather than through the filters of my mind.” Knowing that nothing happens to me, but that everything happens through me for my highest good, helps me rise to my God-perspective about things.
An attitude of gratitude changes everything. If you can try hard, with your own CWGs’ help, to find things to be truly grateful for about the entire experience with your ex—the good, the bad, and the ugly—the leftover memories and confusion can begin to release their hold on your deep psyche.
Now, about those personal CWGs: I am so glad you are doing them because they are enormously beneficial. Please, though, don’t feel you have to “work on going deeper”. Simply allow more information to come through as you become more comfortable with the practice. Different people have different depths of detail and some people’s CWGs are longer than others. The length of the response doesn’t matter, as long as you receive the clarity you desire.
(Annie Sims is the Global Director of CWG Advanced Programs, is a Conversations With God Coach and author/instructor of the CWG Online School. To connect with Annie, please email her at Annie@TheGlobalConversation.com
(If you would like a question considered for publication, please submit your request to: Advice@TheGlobalConversation.com where our team is waiting to hear from you.)
An additional resource: The CWG Helping Outreach offers spiritual assistance from a team of non-professional/volunteer Spiritual Helpers responding to every post from readers within 24 hours or less. Nothing on the CCN site should be construed or is intended to take the place of or be in any way similar to professional therapeutic or counseling services. The site functions with the gracious willing assistance of lay persons without credentials or experience in the helping professions. What these volunteers possess is an awareness of the theology of Conversations with God. It is from this context that they offer insight, suggestions, and spiritual support during moments of unbidden, unexpected, or unwelcome change on the journey of life.
This idea has been swimming in my head for a very long time. At one point in time, I was corresponding with more than 30 inmates in various correctional institutions around the country. The charges ranged from simple burglary to murder. One was even on death row.
I got to know them as men and women, not as criminals. They wrote about their families and about their dreams and their hopes for the future. They were poets, songwriters and artists. Several times a week, my mailbox would be graced with an envelope that was beautifully decorated by an inmate. I used to have a collage of many of these works of art, but sadly, I lost it in a house fire.
I was inspired by these men and women to rethink my ideas about those who commit crimes. To see them not as someone who got what they deserved, as “low life” who don’t deserve any of the “good things” in life, but as a human being who had made some ineffective choices.
I am aware that most people see the justice system as a means of making sure the criminal “gets what s/he deserves”, but I have long seen the justice system as a means of “rehabilitating” those incarcerated within its prison walls. It long ago ceased to make any sense to me to throw these people into cages, treat them like animals, deny them access to any means of bettering themselves and then, when we release them, to be surprised that they return to a life of crime!
A recent insight that came to me is that most crime is about trying to feel in control in a world that feels out of control on so many levels. Those who work in rape crisis centers have long been aware that rape is not a sex crime: it is a crime about power and control. Those who work in women’s shelters have long been aware that domestic violence is not about uncontrollable anger but about power and control over another. (The other crimes are where people just don’t think—they have a momentarily lapse of judgment and make a “stupid” decision. Like someone who shoplifts a cigarette lighter when they have the money in their pocket to pay for it.)
In the CwG material, God tells us that no one does anything inappropriate given his/her view of the world. And then recently, in What God Said, I read:
- [T]he Conversations with God theology suggests that the only motivation that makes sense to our Soul is the goal of experiencing, expressing, and demonstrating Divinity. So we will, as enlightened beings, seek to do “what works” to produce that experience from moment to moment.
It was a sort of “Aha!” moment for me. How “enlightened” we are will determine “what works” for us to produce that experience of Divinity. And what, at its base, is the experience of Divinity? That of creating the life that we choose. And for those who are “less enlightened”, this is experienced as being the one who calls the shots. Being “in control.”
This logically leads to one conclusion: a criminal is seeking to express and demonstrate their view and understanding of Divinity! The creative energy that is part of that divinity manifests as taking control of others to create the world they want when they want it! It is “what works” for them to fulfill that drive to experience Divinity. Until they get caught.
It’s already evident that “getting tough on crime” doesn’t work. Rather than seeking harsher penalties and more jail time for those who have violated the social mores of their culture, perhaps it would be more effective to help them find further enlightenment so the next time they choose to express their Divinity, no one else is adversely affected.
I believe that one of the secrets to a more loving world is empathy. Being able, even for just a second, to put yourself in another’s shoes in even the smallest way will enhance our feeling of Oneness while decreasing the amount of judgment we all encounter in our daily lives. It will increase our level of acceptance and tolerance and diminish the sense of superiority that allows us to justify the harmful way that we treat others at times.
Some kinds of empathy are easier to get in touch with than others. When someone’s family member or beloved pet transitions to the “spirit world”, most of us can empathize with the sense of lose that is felt. We have no problem empathizing with those who experience great joy and happiness at the birth of a child or the promotion they’ve been waiting for or the pride that swells in their heart seeing their child perform in the kindergarten play as the third hippopotamus or score that first goal in a football or soccer game.
But there are other kinds of empathy we seek to avoid, sometimes consciously, sometimes unconsciously. Empathy for things we have deemed “evil” or “wrong” or “bad” is often not something we are consciously willing to allow ourselves to feel. We seem to think that if we can empathize with a murderer or a rapist or an abuser or a thief that part of us becomes a murderer, rapist, abuser or thief. This is not a comfortable feeling for us: we want to think of ourselves as “better” than that, as more spiritually aware, as more “saintly” or more “pure” or simply as a decent human being. We don’t want to admit that we are the same as, that we are One with, those whose faces are plastered on the evening news or are put into jail or even executed for their actions.
Throughout the Conversations with God material, God says that man, in relationship to God, is just as a drop of ocean water is to the ocean: the drop of water is the same as the ocean, differing only in degree. And the same is true of empathy: we have all felt the same feelings that motivate murderers, rapists, abusers and thieves: we just have not felt them to the same degree, therefore the resulting behaviors are different. I realize there are other factors governing behavior, including beliefs, past experiences (whether remembered or not), level of maturity (emotional and spiritual), etc. This is not an attempt to make a direct and exclusive cause and effect connection between feelings and actions. It’s an attempt to demonstrate that we are all more alike than most of us want to admit.
Have you ever gotten so frustrated with your child that you said something like “You are so stupid sometimes!” or “Stop being a spoiled brat!” or reached out and slapped their hand or their backside? Then you’ve done and felt, in a small way, the same thing a child abuser does and feels.
Have you ever gotten into an argument with your spouse/partner and started scream at them “I hate you! You are such as idiot!” or thrown something across the room, not even in their direction or simply not spoken to them for days at a time because you were so angry? You’ve behaved, to a lesser degree, just like an abusive partner in a domestic violence situation.
Have you ever been driving down the street and flipped off a driver who cut you off or laid on your horn at someone who didn’t go as soon as the light was green or got as close to someone’s back bumper as you could without hitting them because they did something to anger you? You’ve acted, in a small way, like someone with road rage.
Have you ever found a $10 bill lying on the ground in the grocery store and just picked it up and put it in your pocket? Or, knowing you were out of bandaids at home, and you’re sitting in an exam room waiting to be seen by a doctor, you open a cabinet and pocket a dozen bandaids? Or you’re walking though a grocery store and you’re so hungry your stomach is growling so you pop a few grapes in your mouth or a piece of candy from the bulk foods bins? Have you ever called in sick when you weren’t and gotten paid for it? Ever called a friend to punch you in on time cause you were running late or, if you still fill in time sheets, ever pad your time sheet with 15 minutes here and there? Have you ever surfed the internet while at work even though your company policy doesn’t allow it? You have, in a small way, acted just like a thief.
Have you ever bought a mouse trap, knowing it was going to kill the mouse it caught? Or have you ever killed a whole lot of mosquitoes or house flies or spiders that were infesting your house? Have you ever struck someone in anger or frustration or even pain? Have you ever driven home when you had had too much to drink? Then you have, in a small way, behaved just like a murderer.
Have you ever intentionally scared someone you knew hated being scared just to laugh at their reaction? Have you ever held someone down and tickled them even if they were yelling, “No! Please stop!” Have you ever given your partner the silent treatment because they didn’t want to be physically intimate and you did? Then you have, in a small way, behaved just like a rapist.
Have you ever forgotten, even once, to provide food or water to a pet? Have you ever forgotten, even once, to pick up your child from a friend’s house or from an after school activity? Have you ever, even once, had to backtrack because you forgot to drop your child off at the sitter or at daycare on your way to work? Then you have behaved, in a small way, like child or animal abusers.
When you’re watching shows like the “American Idol” audition episodes where they make fun of some of the contestants for their abilities or the way they dress or their behaviors, do you laugh and join in from home? Have you ever made fun of someone because of their weight or what they look like? Do you use the word “gay” to mean the same thing as “stupid” or “ridiculous”? Do you ever call someone a “retard” or a “bitch” or any other derogatory term in anger? Then you have behaved, in a small way, just like a bully.
But, I can hear you saying, those are not the same thing as being a murderer or a rapist or an abuser or a thief or a bully!
And you are correct! It’s not the same…anymore than a drop ocean water is the same thing as the ocean….
Thoughts are creative.
“Does this mean all of our thoughts? Every single thing we think, every minute, all day long?
No. And it is important to understand this. Otherwise we’ll wind up making our-selves crazy, trying to monitor every single thought that runs through our mind.
And that is an interesting phrase: “runs through.” If a thought “runs through” your Mind, it does just that. It runs through.
MOST thoughts DO that. They run through our mind like water through a sieve. Such thoughts have very little creative power. They’re moving through our Mind too quickly to build up enough energy to impact physicality.
It is only those thoughts that stick in our Mind that have power. What gives our thoughts power is the repeated thinking of them.
This places energy upon energy, building it up until it really MATTERS. That is: energy becomes physical matter.
SO!!!… if you notice that an idea is running through your Mind that you don’t like…. DON’T GIVE IT A SECOND THOUGHT. I mean that literally!
It’s your second thought that gives it power. (To say nothing of your third, fourth, and fifth thought.) If you repeatedly think something, you can be sure that you are magnifying its power.
This is the same thing as a thought being held in Mind not only ONCE… but by A LOT OF PEOPLE at the SAME TIME. This, too, magnifies the power of thought.
That is why collective prayer works.” Neale Donald Walsch.
Cravings, urges, compulsions, and obsessions are nothing more than our minds giving second, third, fourth, fifth etc… thoughts to an idea that should have just ran through our mind. When we can harness the power of recognizing a thought that no longer represents who we say we are, and make a decision not to pay attention to it, we remove energy from the negative and turn it into a positive.
And it is what we are Be-ing that is so very important in our existence here. Most of us think we are doing sobriety and that can indicate that sobriety is only a temporary state for us. When we decide it is our state of BEING, it becomes a permanent character attribute, one that we should wear on our sleeves so to speak.
Creating successful transformations from any patterned behavior requires an initial period of discipline before the newly chosen behavior becomes the norm. We perform regular functions so often, many times we find we do them without even thinking about them.
This is what I have found to be true of recovery. In the beginning I would entertain thoughts of using. What kept me from acting those out? I was also learning new behavior at the time. The new behavior I was learning was to seek help with my thinking problem. Sharing with other like-minded people, that I was having these thoughts, removed the power from them.
Over time, many months to over a year, the thoughts of using drugs or alcohol became less and less. To the point where, I can honestly say, I do not think about that anymore — ever. I am keenly aware, however, that the absence of cravings or obsession does not make me somehow “fixed” of my addictive nature.
You can see why a program of recovery from addictive or compulsive behaviors suggests that a person go to meetings on a daily basis. When we place our-selves in the rooms with other like-minded people, we are not only building energy upon our new sober thinking, but we are using the collective thoughts of the group to strengthen our resolve.
In order to manifest your hearts desires you must follow some simple steps.
- You must believe it is possible.
- You must acknowledge you are capable of creating it.
- You must set your thoughts in motion to creating this.
- You must be disciplined in keeping your mind focused on the task.
- Keeping in mind there is no such thing as time; remember to be grateful that what you wish already exists. In the program we call this “acting as if.”
Many times we allow our impatience to sidetrack us from our goals. We tire of all the work and no apparent movement towards our respective task. Ultimately, we give up and say things like, “oh well, it just wasn’t meant to be.” I call hogwash on the concept of “meant to be.” If some things are “meant to be”, then, others would be “not meant to be.”
If that is the case then we really do not have free will and we are simply the pawn in some sick twisted game being played out by a higher life form. If you believe the latter, you may want to ask yourself; what would the purpose of physicality be for the creator of all of this?
I am aware of the challenges of being disciplined in our thoughts. Negativity can creep in and take way our momentum. I find a few things can help to keep us on our path.
- Having a vision board
- Having an accountability buddy
- Being involved in a group of like-minded people.
- Starting the day with a reminder that what you wish is already in existence
- Ending the day with thanks for the experience of the journey
- Taking at least one action per day towards your goal
These are just a few of the ways we can remain true to our commitments. If you have others please feel free to share them in the comments section below. What works for you? What hasn’t worked? How can we support you? How can you support us?
(Kevin McCormack, C.A.d ,is a certified addictions professional and auriculotherapist. He is a recovering addict with 26 years of sobriety. Kevin is a practicing auriculotherapist, life coach, and interventionist specializing in individual and family recovery and also co-facilitates spiritual recovery retreats for the CWG foundation. You can visit his website here for more information. To connect with Kevin, please email him at Kevin@TheGlobalConversation.com)
Someone posted this graphic on Facebook awhile ago, presumably in response to news that Kmart will be staying open for 41 hours straight, beginning early on Thanksgiving Day, (for non-Americans reading this, Thanksgiving falls on a Thursday every year, and big sales happen the Friday after stores have been closed for a day.) and several other major retail chains will have opening hours actually on Thanksgiving Day, not the traditional early morning hours of the following Friday, for the “Black Friday” sales.
Of course, even though I agree with this graphic, one must also remember that many/most? work on holidays FOR family. They need the money. Living wages are low, and holiday pay is simply higher.
I think we also have to remember that Americans have a country in which the family structure is being ripped asunder, family “values” are fluid, and we have way too many families that just haven’t bonded, or are broken…and they simply don’t wish to be together. So sad…
But why are these things this way? I have my theories, and many of them are articulated in an article found on Shmoop on line. It says, in part, that during the Eisenhower presidency, things began to shift from a production society, to a consumption society:
“The difference between a production society, which focused on meeting basic needs, and a consumption society, which emphasized customers’ wants, was like the difference between a 1908 Ford Model T and a 1959 Ford Galaxie. The Model T, available only in black, was a utilitarian piece of machinery intended for basic transportation. The Galaxie, decked out in shiny chrome, was a way to show off and to enjoy a sense of luxury, not just to move from place to place. Within a year or two, it would be obsolete as fashion changed. Blessed with abundant resources, America could afford to turn part of its productive capacity to creating glitz and fashionable waste. An older generation was careful to save and reuse; Americans in the Fifties began to use and throw away. They became ‘consumers.’” For full article click here.
Coming from the deprivations of a World War, the temptation towards consumerism was overwhelming. Add to this that the “powers that be” figured out that planned obsolescence would fuel faster turnover, and the marketing world figured out how to make consumers desire things they don’t even need.
We became a consumer society.
We became addicted to “things”, and let “things” define who we are
…and then we became indentured servants to the banks
…and when we became indentured servants
…we did the “right” thing and women started leaving the home, to pay the bills, have more things and in the name of “women’s equality”
…and left children at home, and with strangers
…and we made the choice to let advertisers tell our children that “things” were more important than being with parents
…and parents started giving “things” instead of time to show their children love.
We have created a modern version, here in the United States, of debtors prison. And we have people who no longer know how to interact with one another if we feel the only thing we have to offer is ourselves. And we exported this vision of ourselves, and set about converting the rest of the world.
Please don’t get me wrong on a couple of points here. There is nothing wrong with having those “things” as long as they are not defining your life, and are merely enhancing it. (Even that statement must be caveated with the knowing that manufacturing, as we know it today, is taking a huge toll on natural and human resources, which is an entirely different discussion.) I know full well that having enough money to cover, at the very least, basic human needs, takes a huge strain off of relationships, and facilitates life. I also know that the role of women in this world has to shift, and that “women’s rights” is not a dirty little phrase. In fact, I believe it is the key to changing the direction of this country, and the world.
Women did, indeed, in the 1950’s and especially the 1960’s, step into the current power paradigm, which, obviously to most of us, is not working. But we are in the next phase of recognizing the hole that we have dug for ourselves. I also believe that it goes against our nature to stay in that energy. This is a discussion that I have actually had elsewhere on in this newspaper as well.
I believe that women first had to experience the form of power that had been denied them throughout history, the power of force, in order to feel they had self determination at last. Power is actually not a bad thing, in and of itself, and is needed at times in order to be the guiding parent, the household organizer, and, yes, the business woman, and more. But we are now remembering that it has to be tempered with something else…that intangible that is the feminine. Power had to be experienced in order to recognize it wasn’t what was truly being sought. It is now time to stop playing the game by the old rules. Time to stop putting a skirt on the men’s rules and calling them feminine. Women now must recognize there is power in being able to mix their femininity with their male strength. Time to stop living the “We are all One…and all men are created equal…unless you are a woman.”
Still, even in the old paradigm, women began to teach, if incompletely, that there really IS a different way to view one another. Unfortunately, in most cases, the change was external…men doing dishes, washing clothes, housework…but then it became more subtle. It became okay for men to share the child-rearing responsibilities… and who is the mentor in this situation? The woman. Now we have men recognizing their own gentle strength, and men and women teaching this to their sons and daughters.
Right now we still have too many women so wrapped up in the power paradigm that they don’t even, necessarily recognize that they perpetuate the paradigm that says they are less than. But this next phase is happening.
Women, when they are balanced and spiritual and assured of who they are, will be the ones to raise the boys who know the same…and then men will also know their own true power and be allowed to put down the burdens of the current use of that power.
Balanced women. Balanced men. New paradigm. Children who feel connected to family for a lifetime. No need to outsource happiness and still feel empty. No need to shop on Thanksgiving? Time to begin living and feeling a new “Oneness” concept? Time to truly be Grateful?
My wife called me crying because of a couple she found in a laundromat. I found out later they were homeless but chose to live their lives in the streets. My wife wanted to help them so we bought them food and gave them blankets and pillows. (I had tried to get them a room in nearby motels but they were well known and had created such a mess and “smell” before that the motels had to throw everything away.) Other people had paid cash for a room and then put the homeless couple in there without the manager being aware. In other words there was “no room in the inn.”
Because of my background in law enforcement I found some police officers and spoke to them about a homeless shelter. There are none in the city and there are up to 25 “couples” they are aware of living in wooded areas within the city limits.
I now feel I would like to help with love, money, and time, to help these people but do not have a clue where to start. Any suggestions?… Mickey
Dear Mickey… How about soliciting help from the churches in your area? Perhaps you can put together a meeting with area church leaders asking them to help you implement a program called “Room In the Inn.”
The homeless people can sleep in the church’s fellowship halls, taking turns on different nights so that it wouldn’t be overwhelming to any one church. If you can get 7 churches to commit, each church would have one night per week. If you can get 14 churches to help, that’s just one night every two weeks.
The members can volunteer their time helping with meals and clean-up and have a couple of men from the church designated to stay overnight. The ladies can bring in potluck dinners and breakfasts.
How’s that sound? Think how great you’ll feel if you get this going! And your sweet wife won’t have to cry anymore.
(Annie Sims is the Global Director of CWG Advanced Programs, is a Conversations With God Coach and author/instructor of the CWG Online School. To connect with Annie, please email her at Annie@TheGlobalConversation.com
(If you would like a question considered for publication, please submit your request to: Advice@TheGlobalConversation.com where our team is waiting to hear from you.)
An additional resource: The CWG Helping Outreach offers spiritual assistance from a team of non-professional/volunteer Spiritual Helpers responding to every post from readers within 24 hours or less. Nothing on the CCN site should be construed or is intended to take the place of or be in any way similar to professional therapeutic or counseling services. The site functions with the gracious willing assistance of lay persons without credentials or experience in the helping professions. What these volunteers possess is an awareness of the theology of Conversations with God. It is from this context that they offer insight, suggestions, and spiritual support during moments of unbidden, unexpected, or unwelcome change on the journey of life.
